Today, I was Skyping with this kid, when his girlfriend started arguing with him. They do this every other week, and there was a bet on when they'd finally break up. I egged the guy on and told him not to take her shit. She ended up dumping him. Now I feel like an asshole, and all for a lousy $20. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, the girl I thought I was dating got into a fight with me over the phone. She did this because she bet her boyfriend that she could make me cry on FaceTime. She won the bet. FML
Today, I was Skyping with my girlfriend. I was incredibly tired and just wanted to go to bed, but she just kept talking and wouldn't let me go. I ended up blurting out, "Your mom's a cunt." just to start a fight and have an excuse to hang up on her. I feel like an asshole. FML
Today, I found out that my mom bet my dad $100 that she could pay my boyfriend ten bucks to break up with me. She is now $90 richer. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend and a woman answered. Turns out, she's also his girlfriend. She broke up with me on his behalf. FML
Today, my crush won the bet that I made with him yesterday. The bet? That he couldn't land a date by the end of the day. Not only am I down $10, but a possible boyfriend too. FML
Today, I told my friend about a fight I had earlier with my girlfriend. He thought it'd be funny to use my phone while I was in the bathroom and text her "ure such a cunt". She wouldn't believe the truth, even when my friend confessed to her. She thought I paid him to take the fall. FML
Today, I overheard my mother Skyping with her new "boyfriend" about the $1,000 she just sent him. She barely knew what internet dating was three weeks ago. FML
Today, my girlfriend's dad offered me $100 to break up with his daughter. I eagerly replied "No", but my girlfriend grabbed the money and said, "Deal." FML
Today, I called my ex-girlfriend to see if she would meet up with me so I could give her money to pay off the rest of the TV we had on layaway before we broke up. Turns out she cancelled it and took all the money I put into it. I put $500 down. FML
Today, I got in an argument with an ex-girlfriend who kept tactlessly bragging to me about her new boyfriend. I told her to read what she'd sent me, then pretend her boyfriend was telling her that. Fifteen minutes later, her boyfriend calls me, yelling for making her feel sad. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
billyme 4
you totally deserve it
zandalee 20
You sound bored. Maybe it's time you got yourself a life.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (137)
billyme 4
you totally deserve it
emba_fml 13
yea, that's pretty damn selfish. /:
gamercanadian 11
Have some class and mind your own business.
MeeshaMeeshaPup 8
Does OP not have anything better to do than ruining other people's (possibly already failing) relationships?
MoodyBlue320 11
I mean, if OP were "interfering", per say, in a sincere manner like he sees she's a bitch and wants better for his friend, then it would be okay, but to break them up for a bet, what a douchebag. YDI.
Shrike 24
*per se It's Latin, mate.
mboehm88 3
7 - Although it was selfish, it sounds like he inadvertently did the guy a favor if they're arguing a shit ton.
lavitaebella_fml 0
^ They could have fought like an old married couple or something :( Don't get involved with what doesn't involve you next time, OP!
fuckmebutdontfml 16
Did he deserve the $20 or the feeling like an asshole? I agree he deserves...
elletex 8
Put some clothes on.
Wederoney 16
Meh, don't feel too bad. All you told him was to man up and stop taking that crap from her which is what he should've done anyway.
Daiyuki 5
Really? No one? I guess I'll have to do it: Why were you Skyping with some kid?
kawaiisakura 12
For ppl saying dont get involved if it doesnt involve you, does that include wen ppl r having affairs? Should people not tell the one being cheated on since it doesnt involve them? Relationships like that need the butting in. Most times those ppl r just in it to b w somebody n would rathr fight than leave
Kamon97 23
Dude $20 just to break a couple up I'd totally do it haha
adins1997 0
You could buy some ice cream to make yourself feel better
NuTrees 9
Yeah. Getting fat will be your punishment.
kei1108 13
Um, OR buy the kid some ice-cream and comfort him through his breakup!
JoeSaysSsso 2
Ya, then he'll be broken up and fat.
Awes0meperson 10
You know, just because someone eats ice cream doesn't mean that they will get fat.
zandalee 20
You sound bored. Maybe it's time you got yourself a life.
Nightwing98 22
Instead of ruining other people's
zandalee 20
I agree! Maybe time to get a dog or a hobby
noshatsherlockk 15
This FML is suspiciously vague.. I automatically pictured a chatroulette murderer.
JoeSaysSsso 2
thatssSs an ofensssSssive comment you got there.... *BOOM*
ladyLALAA 29
56, chatroulette murderer? All I ever get is ol men's dicks!
ladyLALAA 29
*old
Damn_Hippster 11
Lol I love OP's name :p but that was a dick move.
youjustmademelol 4
Your not an asshole, your shit. The hell you messing up relationships for money?
Late_night83 25
Dumb FML.
PostItSticker 11
Now, you can comfort the dude and give him $20 :D
goldfishgod 20
Your profile pic & username are my two favorite things.
Bluedog42 7
"comfort"
white16sox 19
He spelled comfort correctly.
Daiyuki 5
That's why he didn't put comfort* he put "comfort" you know, quotation marks? As in the phrase: You're "intelligent", you should help humanity. It seems to me like he was making a pedo joke since comforting usually involves hugs and such.
MrBrightside21 20
You need to get to the Wizard of Oz, because you need a heart, tinman.
dudeman1212 22
...or a brain. Pretty stupid to not know you'll feel like this afterwards...
br0ccoli 15
I thumbed you just for your profile pic
OHai15 12
i see what u did there >.>
br0ccoli 15
Don't feel bad, it was bound to happen. In fact, you helped him out of his misery. You're a great friend and you probably saved yourself hours of hearing him complain.
scarface90 8
Yea but he didn't do it to be a good friend, he did it to win a lousy $20 bet, doesn't sound like a good friend but at least he's feeling guilty about it
l0v3p4in 7
Friend? Where in this FML does OP reference this "kid" as his friend? I don't even infer any type of close relationship between OP and this "kid" other than some casual acquaintance to whom he communicates weekly, which doesn't exactly necessitate a "friendship."
br0ccoli 15
46- sounds like he won by default, not on purpose. 48-people skype with people weekly and not consider them a friend?
l0v3p4in 7
63 - Yes, it is possible for people to talk weekly even for years and still not consider that person a friend. Friendship is not based on the quanity of time two people share, but the quality of the relationship. Just because Facebook labeled every person you connect with a "friend" doesn't make it so in reality. Like the word "love," "friend" has become overused and has lost quite a bit of the original context to which it was attributed.
br0ccoli 15
I wouldn't spend that much time on someone I didn't consider 'a friend' lol. That weekly skype would take away time from actual friends don't you think?
DocBastard 40
Don't feel too bad. The reason you feel like an asshole is because YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE.
danishbagel 3
Dammit, I was about to say the same thing.
cheaptrix 6
Doc probably surgically removed the comment from your mind, so he could post it before you
nadnerbz 6
This is why people need to stay out of other peoples relationships
tudoramanda 0
I totally agree with you!!!