Today, after having spent days working on it, I finished off a really elaborate seasonal greetings card for my boss. When I gave it to him, he took one look at it, flicked it in his trash can and said, "Fuck off, Steve." So much for a Christmas bonus. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boss decided that a mug and a public 'thank you' were a sufficient substitute for a Christmas bonus. FML
Today, my boss sent me a text message saying, "You're fired. Merry Christmas!" FML
Today, everyone at the office was finally presented with the bonuses our boss had promised to pay us by the end of last year. Turns out he was never authorized to promise any such thing, so he ended up just giving us signed "thank you" letters instead. FML
Today, I gave my boss a gift card as a late birthday present, since I wasn't in the office on his actual birthday. He accused me of trying to bribe my way to a promotion, and suspended me on the spot. FML
Today, after 3 years of hard work, very little vacation and no raises, our boss got us a crappy box of drug store cookies as an employee appreciation gift. Which he ended up eating. FML
Today, my boss sent a Christmas present… to my dog. FML
Today, I was in a bad mood after being stuck in traffic for 2 hours and late for work. I was walking to my building when I saw a 100 dollar note flying my way. A man called after me for it, but being selfish I took the note in my pocket as a little reward. That man was my boss. Yes, I'm fired. FML
Today, while at work, I was asked to see my boss. I was informed that the company would be laying off 20 people, and that I was one of them. I was told I could finish off the week, then was sent back to work. Twenty minutes later, my boss walked around and handed us all Christmas party invitations. FML
Today, while making a grand show of his generosity, my boss gave me my own commissions as a wedding gift. FML
Today, my boss asked me if I had any special plans for Christmas. After I told him I was planning a trip to Canada, he snapped, "Well, you can forget it. I need you at the office." FML
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Top comments
killak41 9
Maybe if you put on a little more glitter...
Lanceeden 12
I find it funny his fml name is anonymous. I know his true identity....STEVE. -dramatic chipmunk stare-
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Comments (229)
spider63 0
I would punched him in his throat right there!
2ndSucks 15
No you wouldn't.
perdix 31
Steve, why did you say you are Anonymous when you identify yourself in the story? Seems odd, doesn't it, Steve? Steve, spending days on a "seasons greetings" cards is just creepy. You're a grown man, aren't you, Steve? You really thought a homemade non-Christmas Christmas card was going to score you some big cash? You do need to **** off, Steve!
cheeseboy77 0
perdix is correct (as usual). this FML seems very fake. Why the hell would a guy spend DAYS making a Christmas card for his boss?are you that stupid Steve?
ohmandapants 17
He never said anything about this FML sounding fake.
dixiefoxx 22
I'm sure Steve is really that stupid, because, believe it or not.. There's a lot of stupid people out there that would do that but yeah, I am wondering who would honestly do that, and perdix, I couldn't have said it better myself
Googoo27 12
Completely off topic (dont hate) but almost at 10,000 comments perdix. Way to go (If FML has PM's, tell me now, i use the iphone app so if i get em, i wont see em)
perdix 31
Yes, FML has PMs. Hey, I get another comment for that ;) Thanks for noticing that.
KiddNYC1O 22
If you combine his previous account (plexico) he'd be almost at 20,000 comments...
farhil 14
Perdix is Plexico :O /mind blown. Plexico was my favorite FML'er back in the day... No wonder why I like Perdix so much
KiddNYC1O 22
Yep. I miss Intoxicunt.
KiddNYC1O 22
...lol
Trooth 13
Well time to stop kissing up to your boss :)
reaganomics 6
Hmm don't be a brown nosing bitch.......i would have asked how much company time it took you to put glitter on a card while everyone else was working
jk4life 1
FAke no one spends days on a stupid card
ohmandapants 17
Just wait til you get moderated. Some people do spend days on things like cards. They're called PERFECTIONISTS Edit: I have marvelous timing.
aguynamedzac 0
Nice job Steven!
flockz 20
*puts on troll sweatbands* wow you asshole. why would you just assume his name is steven? what if his name was steventula or steveaceratops? what then? ya now it seems like you just put him in a corner of embarassment and self hatred for having such a terrible name. just think, maybe his boss read your comment and decided to fire "steve" for having a name not as cool as steven. now his wife's leaving him too. greeeat. you just ruined his life. and that's how you properly troll the internet. *takes off sweatbands*
dhardesty23 8
well it was worth a shot. maybe next year
ohmandapants 17
Don't encourage him.
Mackenzie99 6
Aha what a nice boss you have
SillyFart 7
It's the thought that counts??
2dog 15
Did you take it out of the trash can?