Today, a 65-ish year-old man told me that he's married and not supposed to look at other women, but that I tempt him. All while sitting next to his wife, who then told me I was going to hell. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I discovered that my male coworker, who coincidentally shares my last name, has been telling everyone we're married. I'm 26; he's 58. FML
Today, a huge and angry man stormed into my work and threatened to kill me if I didn't stop sleeping with his wife. He then threatened to come back and kick my ass if I so much as texted his wife again. The problem is, I'm married, have never cheated and I work for my wife's father. FML
Today, I met a new guy at work who wouldn't stop hitting on me. We ended up on a six-hour shift together watching a pool, so we were wearing nothing but bathing suits when he began grabbing me inappropriately. When I confided in my female coworker about it, she told me that he was her husband. FML
Today, my wife is mad because some kid in a store offered her the seniors' discount and she got offended. I had to tell her she’s 66 years-old and is actually entitled to that discount, so she should calm the hell down. She’s not spoken to me in over 24 hours. FML
Today, as I was bent over at my waitressing job, an elderly woman walked by and smacked my ass. I looked at her, shocked, and she said, "It was too tempting with you bent over like that, I have a dirty old mind." I didn't know whether to be flattered or horrified. Maybe both. FML
Today, I was told off by a random woman who said that I should be ashamed of myself for dating such an older man. I was having dinner with my dad. FML
Today, my boss told me he suspected his wife was cheating on him. I told him to pull up her Facebook page to look for suspicious activity. I looked at her profile picture and said, "Damn, that girl next to her fine! You know her?" It was his sixteen year-old daughter. FML
Today, I got a phone call out of the blue from a young man, who screamed that he was going to kill me for sleeping with his fiancée. I told him I am a 49-year-old man who hasn't been laid since my wife passed away, four years ago. He stammered, shouted "Well she was a slut too" and hung up. FML
Today, my wife called me a pervert and a degenerate for lusting after a teenage girl. I’d found some old pictures from high school and remarked about how sexy she’s always been. It was her I was talking about. I said she’d always been attractive, but liking her as a teen is now weird I guess. FML
Today, I saw my husband at a restaurant, laughing with a hot woman. He'd told me he was at a meeting with the VP of his company. Furious, I barged in and started screaming at them, calling him a cheater and a liar. Turns out the woman was actually the VP of his company, and they were in the middle of the meeting. FML
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Top comments
Soninuva 41
This mentality is what's wrong with the world.
lexred 30
What the hell?
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Comments (102)
Soninuva 41
This mentality is what's wrong with the world.
IamHercules 24
The opinion of two senile old farts do NOT represent what is wrong with this world.
Lalala579121 28
So old age is what's wrong with the world?
Soninuva 41
Unfortunately it isn't just their opinion. Many people believe this, hence my saying it's that type of mentality which is problematic.
9a_1z 12
Sadly I'm not surprised, I've heard men and women alike trying to justify treating young women like things to be oogled because they dress a certain way or are shaped a certain way. I remember being at a church service where the girls were begged to dress more modestly because it was causing the older men distressing thoughts (there were a lot of young female students there who, naturally, dressed like students instead of nuns when they attended). No words of caution or advice for the old men though. (edit - I replied to the wrong comment so this looks out of context, sorry!)
TrippingOnAcid 29
I believe that this "mentality" is what's wrong with the world as a general concept. This may be one specific incident but it gives an example of "victim blaming" which is an awful mentality
EarlFug 19
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I can't figure out what you mean by "mentality"? Possibilities: 1. Old married man admiring woman 2. SAYING so to young woman 3. Saying so in front of his wife 4. Wife being upset 5. Wife somehow blaming you To me, some might be offended at any of 1-4 but #5 is the real FML. But is this really a worldwide problem?
EarlFug 19
OK downvotes are fun but would anyone care to point out where I'm wrong? Seriously.
Vanderdale 14
It's this mentality of blaming women for the sexual attention they get from men. This man's wife, instead of lecturing her husband for his inappropriate behaviour, verbally abused the OP like she was responsible for the husband being a perv. Catcalling, sexual harrassment, even rape, people start talking about what the woman did to invite that attention on themselves, like they 'tempted' these guys into bad behaviour. THAT is the mentality people are talking about. And it is a pervasive problem.
Jayms_fml 32
Thank you #79, well said! Now I understand where #1 is coming from.
R_L_Jack 11
Some men do think only with their dicks at any age. Poster who said women can't win is right, fat and ugly punished, pretty or cute, punished. I am 51 and the harassment has waned somewhat, but still happens. Now I view most of it as pretty quaint, esp. when a young man does it, lol. This last summer I was with my husband stretching my legs after a long trip and 2 dudes about 28 slowed down and whooped at me.
rydersmomma16 21
Well said.
EarlFug 19
Good point 79, thanks.
lexred 30
What the hell?
boating_guy 33
You think they do this just to troll people?
gabe67 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Damn, well I guess your going to hell then.
gotaplanstan 28
her going to hell is what?
Reihna_fml 14
Well, obviously, you should just laugh that off. The woman has spent her life believing that her husband is not responsible for his actions. There is no way to fix that. If hell were real, he would be a candidate, because in their estimation, impure thoughts constitute adultery.
Jowisee 29
Well that's a bit ****** up...
Andrmelon 7
This is definitely your fault, what are you thinking? Trying to tempt an old man*sarcasm*
Nicky_ham_fml 10
My bad. Something about all black and an apron gets them going.
cheeeksss 29
Yeah because obviously men only think with their penises. Thus, women are responsible for tempting all men with their short skits and high heels. This is why women must be covered head to toe at all times, dammit! UGH.
rydersmomma16 21
Lol you are awesome OP.
colder13 10
OP wearing all black and an apron sounds like a fancy coffee shop to me...maybe it was that you provided the caffeine that raised his lust?
Mathalamus 25
well, that's new.
MidnaLink 35
No, not really.
Mathalamus 25
i didn't know what else to say. and, a lecherous husband with the wife essentially allowing it to happen...is new to me.
XxDanno316xX 27
If you didn't know what to say, you could always say nothing. You're not obligated to comment mate :)
scyth3s 13
I don't have anything to add.
Rkikkas9713 25
I love the joke behind #37's comment.
Saraishi 25
@#16 It's very common: the spouse rather than dealing with the facts, shift the blame to their spouses targets.
DoomedGemini 38
There was a rapist that went got in trouble, and during the trial you know what the victim got to hear? His girlfriend and family blaming her saying that she wanted it. It's terrible and sad, but it's sadly common. That's an extreme of it, but I'm sure everyone has seen where a partner cheats and the person blames and shifts their anger to the person their partner cheated with, whether they were aware of the relationship or not.
lawls79 14
I'm I the only one wondering how she looked?
militarybrat 21
Does it matter? Hint: the answer is NO.
tomvertigo 17
Tell her that at least in Hell you'll get unending barbecue, free heat and plenty of company since her sinner of a husband will be joining you.
Unlovable_Me 14
Those are the type of people who shame rape victims for the clothes they wear. Absurd. Well on the bright side OP I'll meet you there! ha.