Today, my wife is mad because some kid in a store offered her the seniors' discount and she got offended. I had to tell her she’s 66 years-old and is actually entitled to that discount, so she should calm the hell down. She’s not spoken to me in over 24 hours. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it's the second day my wife hasn’t been to work at all, because a cashier called her ma’am instead of miss. Apparently, it’s the first time this has happened and she’s so upset that she might be visibly growing old that she’s been in bed for two days crying. We’re both only 27 years-old, FFS. FML
Today, I had to stand next to my wife at the supermarket, beet-red and pretending not to exist; about half an hour into our shopping, she completely lost her shit at the advertising on the loudspeaker, turned to another patron, and screamed into his face to shut the fuck up. FML
Today, I came home in an awful mood, and grumbled to my wife that sometimes I want to strangle my boss. My wife regularly screams up and down the house over the most minor shit, but apparently this upset her so much that she took the kids to her mom's, and is demanding I get anger management. FML
Today, I got bitched out by some lady in a Walmart because I looked at her funny while she was on the phone, loudly bragging about "slapping the shit out of" her kids. FML
Today, my wife has been grumpy all day, because she decided to get herself worked up over an argument we had and then peacefully settled three months ago. Like she suddenly gets to reopen the argument for no reason. I’m refusing to continue the argument on principle, hence her grumpiness. FML
Today, my wife, who recently had cancer, made an offhand comment that my 30-year-old sister took offense to. Instead of saying something, she went and called our parents. My dad then called and yelled at me for 5 minutes about it. FML
Today, a 65-ish year-old man told me that he's married and not supposed to look at other women, but that I tempt him. All while sitting next to his wife, who then told me I was going to hell. FML
Today, my wife is mad because she forgot our anniversary. Not me, her. She thought it was today and got mad at me for having nothing planned. It’s tomorrow, and I do have stuff planned for us. So she’s mad at me because she got it wrong and felt like an idiot, which is somehow my fault. FML
Today, my wife and I got into an argument. She ran out, yelling. Later, at work, I felt guilty, so I picked up some flowers and a card. When I presented them to her, she looked puzzled. I made the mistake of reminding her about our argument. She is now mad at me, again. FML
Today, my wife is giving me the silent treatment and has locked herself in the bedroom, all because I politely asked her to put the dishcloth away when she was done with it. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Yudith 28
Tell your wife that she has to own those senior discounts. Tell her to flaunt her ID and to proudly ask for the discount before the cashier has a chance to say a word. This way, nobody can say anything about how old or young she looks. She might even get more compliments this way.
rebelwithmouseyhair 18
Actually you didn't have to tell her...
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (6)
rebelwithmouseyhair 18
Actually you didn't have to tell her...
Pink_Turnips 14
she's delusional, he definitely needed to tell her 🤣
Yudith 28
Tell your wife that she has to own those senior discounts. Tell her to flaunt her ID and to proudly ask for the discount before the cashier has a chance to say a word. This way, nobody can say anything about how old or young she looks. She might even get more compliments this way.
J_Free_Woods 29
OP, the point is no woman wants to be told they look OLD. I had a great aunt who went to a different part of her state to try to hide how old she was. When she was in her 90’s she had a group of friends who thought she was in her 70’s and never tried correcting them.
RichardPencil 32
Stupid ******' kid. You never offer senior discounts -- you make the seniors claim them. And when they do, you say, "Young lady, I'm gonna need some ID."
Iifa 7
Oof... Age is just a number but at current state of affairs I'd take any discounts. I just turned 32, and to say I was disappointed that it wasn't 62 was huge understatement... Own the discounts
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Wow, someone complaining about getting a discount in this economy? Your wife is a special one, isn't she?