Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for coming inside her because she didn't want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she did not want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML
Today, I got a text from my girlfriend. After only having sex once, where I wore a condom and didn't even get to come, she says that she's pregnant. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she's pregnant. She'd told me she was on birth control, so I asked her to show me. She had been sticking the pills up her vagina like a suppository. FML
Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend is on the pill, and even though my girlfriend took emergency contraception, she became pregnant days after the first time we had sex without a condom. FML
Today, the one time, THE ONE TIME, we ran out of condoms and had sex anyway, my girlfriend got pregnant, even though she’s on the pill. I didn’t even orgasm inside her, I had to do a Google search to learn that live sperm can emerge and go inside her even before I orgasm. We are so screwed. FML
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML
Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to let me play porn while we were getting busy. The girl in the video said, "You don't need a condom, you can just pull out." I noticed she had a caesarean scar and burst out laughing. My girlfriend stormed out before I could explain. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
You're going to have shitty kids.
Paramorefan2 1
wow. that sucks. she's stupid.
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Comments (432)
kaileigh10 2
wow. she's stupid
kcTornado 0
I hope that's not you in the pic #33 cuz that pic is NASTY!
mattstermind93 0
eew that's a nasty pic
crzygirl1980 7
Oops I piled in my mouth looking @ #33's pic! Tuck your roll in damn!
crzygirl1980 7
Okay is vomit better than puked? Stupid iPod auto correction thought @ first they changed my word!
dirtraceramerica 0
what an idiot. she's dumb!
Cinn_fml 23
Wow, that's paranoia... Either she received really wrong sex ed, or she's just thick.
GoodLookingGeese 10
it's probably her part of the game, I think she rather got pissed that he has finished without her.. but as it would sound egoist she has found another fake reason to focus her anger and slap the OP..
Cinn_fml 23
Well, there is that, but surely there would be a more plausible reason?
CitizenSnipz 0
slutty*
Lpfan55 0
89, who are you talking to?
jdd_hellokitty 0
Ha, what a dumbass. You can do better OP.
hobojo11 0
was the pun intended ? dumb ASS tehehe
lovelyliz916 5
She's obviously not mature enough to be having sex if she thinks you can get pregnant via anal sex. Lmao x)
Kua_Mei 0
Erm, I hate to break it to you, but...
BethOSUBeavers 6
You CAN get pregnant that way.
x805xUnknown 6
Hahahhaha, omgg!!!! #7 Is King!!!!! That shit made me laugh sooo hard!!!
fakeaccountX 6
you should have donkey punched her in return
Hgielad_720 0
*didn't *she's
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Let me guess, the only things you like about her are "physical", right? YDI, dude. You picked her. =
CitizenSnipz 0
I guess she's... -puts on assglasses- ass dumb ass they cum. EPIC YEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHH
Lpfan55 0
95, every time you make a CSI joke, god kills a kitten. Please stop.
tails9888 5
95, that was in good taste :)
truthinlies 1
95 that was pure win
TheWicked 4
hahahaha