Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for coming inside her because she didn't want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she did not want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML
Today, I got a text from my girlfriend. After only having sex once, where I wore a condom and didn't even get to come, she says that she's pregnant. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that she's pregnant. She'd told me she was on birth control, so I asked her to show me. She had been sticking the pills up her vagina like a suppository. FML
Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend is on the pill, and even though my girlfriend took emergency contraception, she became pregnant days after the first time we had sex without a condom. FML
Today, the one time, THE ONE TIME, we ran out of condoms and had sex anyway, my girlfriend got pregnant, even though she’s on the pill. I didn’t even orgasm inside her, I had to do a Google search to learn that live sperm can emerge and go inside her even before I orgasm. We are so screwed. FML
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl. Things were getting pretty hot, so I decided to smack her butt. I missed. I smacked my balls instead. Real hard. FML
Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to let me play porn while we were getting busy. The girl in the video said, "You don't need a condom, you can just pull out." I noticed she had a caesarean scar and burst out laughing. My girlfriend stormed out before I could explain. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
You're going to have shitty kids.
Paramorefan2 1
wow. that sucks. she's stupid.
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Comments (432)
Natz18 0
Babe, you were ******* her in the arse, and came up there. There is nothing wrong with your life, stop moaning!!! Haha
fmlisforlols 0
Yea, we cool.
scooter69 0
what an idiot lol that's embarrasing
kcTornado 0
sucks to be you! eww @ at doing anal though
ben2042 0
53, yours is the funniest comment ever!! I'm an Aussie and I'm disgusted with the thought that someone doesn't know how reproduction works...hmmm somethings really wrong here. btw to the guy who wrote this-consider yourself lucky not too many girls take it up the ass...enjoy it whilst you can!
tmmundy 17
#129 I cldnt agree more!!! I have never tried it, nor will I ever!! the ass is for getting rid of toxins, why wld u want someone to shove them back in and get it everywhere? gross!!
beenieweenies 0
dude, TMI ! >; /
Person1233 13
Pics or it didn't happen.
Person1233 13
Pics or it didn't happen.
WarByrd 0
really? this sounds way too retarded for an actual FML. i think this was over played to get comments.