Today, after I, my fiance, and the doctors tried all day to get my son to eat for more than just three minutes straight, he decided to eat for thirty minutes straight in the middle of the night when I just wanted to sleep. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend had an appointment he had to wait months for, after he finally agreed to try to figure out what's making him so tired all the time. He slept through it. FML
Today, I had to stop my 26 year old fiancé from picking his nose and eating it like a little boy. Three times. FML
Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got him to sleep, I tried to go to bed. My husband is now snoring, farting and taking up my side of the bed. I desperately need some sleep. FML
Today, my husband tried to annoy me by slurping on his almost-finished drink. I yelled at him to knock it off. Later, our daughter told her class that mommy and daddy had been fighting about his drinking during breakfast. FML
Today, I'm in the hospital and it's been 44 hours since I've eaten anything. My doctors won't let me eat and my parents are sitting across the room, eating. FML
Today, my boyfriend came home and demanded dinner. I started suggesting things, but he threw out that we should just fend for ourselves. I made pasta and offered him some, but he decided to throw a fit and go to bed at 6:30pm without dinner. He then woke up at 9 to complain he was hungry, then slept on the couch. FML
Today, my wife had a shit fit because my son said I hadn't fed him. I'd asked him four times what he wanted for breakfast, and every time he said, "I'm not hungry right now." Great start to the fucking weekend. FML
Today, my newborn daughter has kept me up all day and all night for the past few days. Usually my husband sleeps. I finally cracked and yelled for his help, only for him to scream at me that he needs sleep and gives her to me anyway. FML
Today, my fiancé turned 21. I stayed up and took care of him for 3 hours while he puked his guts out. When I FINALLY get him to bed, he jumps up and rips the lid off a plastic container on the floor and pukes in it. It was full of all my yearbooks, baby pictures, and childhood memories. FML
Today, I had an very long day at work. I also had to take my daughter to the dentist and ballet class. Later, my 3 year-old son was having a diarrhoea, needing care, yet I pulled myself up, cooked, fed, read, cleaned the whole house except the kids' bedroom. My brother-in-law came, looked only at that and judged me horribly. FML
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Top comments
rgkkk 17
Welcome to parenthood, where children don't do what you want them to do and the points don't matter
RichardPencil 32
Are you breastfeeding a baby? I'm imagining a 28-year-old loser going to town on a huge pot of Mac and Cheese. It's funnier.
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Comments (10)
RichardPencil 32
Are you breastfeeding a baby? I'm imagining a 28-year-old loser going to town on a huge pot of Mac and Cheese. It's funnier.
rgkkk 17
Welcome to parenthood, where children don't do what you want them to do and the points don't matter
obx0414 13
Me tried to get my son to eat?
timinator5000 28
I'm guessing breast feeding
sirrubberduckie 37
This is a reference to the trick you can use to figure out which pronoun to use in a sentence. OP incorrectly used "me" when she should have used "I," which becomes apparent when you remove the other pronouns, like this commenter did. Grammar corrections usually get downvoted no matter what though.
obx0414 13
Me tried to get my son to eat??
TxKitten 8
Is this a baby and you're nursing? If so... I assure you this is pretty normal. It's a rough time, I know, but you'll get through it.
obx0414 13
Me was trying to get my kid to eat?
AmbrosiaFan 19
Newborns eat when they are hungry. Don't force feed him.
DoctorPALO 14
You do know that babies aren't programmable, right? They do things on their own schedules. Welcome to parenthood.
mala_19 20
Yes me. English is not my first language and honestly that's what sleep deprivation does to you. My son was hospitalized due to fatigue and weight loss therefore the doctor did put him on a food schedule.. . With a bottle for dessert... He is getting better now.
Mathalamus 25
At least he is eating.. focus on what’s important.