Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. This is the seventh time in a row that she hasn't moved or made any noises the entire way through. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, my girlfriend fell asleep during sex. This isn't the first time. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were making out, and about to have sex, when she asked me to "do that thing we did yesterday". We haven't had sex in 6 days. FML
Today, in the middle of having sex, my girlfriend stopped moaning. I asked what was wrong. She said, "I'm bored." FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML
Today, my girlfriend were having sex. When I finished, she whispered in my ear, "30 seconds." FML
Today, my girlfriend of a year and I had sex for the first time in several weeks due to relationship problems; I came in less than 10 seconds. We're still having problems. FML
Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML
Today my girlfriend actually moved during sex. I love her, but she's so awful in bed. FML
Today, I learned two things. First, my girlfriend loves sex. Second, I'm practically the only one she hasn't had sex with in the 2 months we've been dating. FML
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Top comments
kg163401 0
I dub thee corpse ******
yazah 0
Try deflating her and then blowing her back up. :)
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Comments (404)
corrinaswan 0
it's either you suck or she just isn't one of those types of people
heyred 11
Maybe it's time you asked what's up?
hellokimmiee 5
maybe she wants you to get the message that you suck without actually telling you.... 7th time? poor girl
killasms 0
maybe u should pick her up and carry her somewhere else for a change of pace
FlyingLazerWALRU 0
Is she sleeping with her eyes open, just so you think she's awake?
Crazybadger1818 0
Maybe your dick is small
corplawyr 0
ok. communication can't be said enough. how can u stay "motivated" when there's no interaction?
Erik125 0
ur stroke ain't right my friend
mx_17 0
maybe she's a fat bitch that is just lazy as hell.
LifesJusGreat 7
Why are you having intercourse with a dead corpse? It's not healthy.