Today, a friend informed me that my dog's name means "penis" in Greek. I live in a predominantly Greek neighbourhood, and apparently I've been screaming for "dong" every evening for the past 3 years. No wonder they don't talk to me much. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized that in French, my name means "penis." This wouldn't be so bad if my dad wasn't fluent in French. FML
Today, we got a dog. My husband was adamant that we should name him Gonit, so I agreed. A friend asked what the name meant, and my husband said, "Why wouldn't you name a dog Gonit?" Then I got it. FML
Today, I heard someone calling my name. It was my neighbor. Turns out they named their dogs after my mother, my sister, and me. FML
Today, I learned that the cute pet name my boyfriend has been calling me for the past month is actually an acronym for "pain in the a**". FML
Today, I found out that the nickname my friend has been calling me in Japanese for the past year is the word for "Idiot". FML
Today, I learned that my parents' nickname for my fiancé is "dickwad." FML
Today, my dog carried on with his recent habit of trying to hump me. When I told my mom, she just joked that he's my new boyfriend. Now my whole family is just calling him my boyfriend. FML
Today, I found out that the loving nickname my Chinese mother has been calling me my entire life essentially translates to "little retard". FML
Today, I overheard my parents talking about our family pet. Or at least I thought they were, until my mother exclaimed, "Honestly, I don't know why we keep her." Our dog is male. FML
Today, I got several noise complaints from various neighbours about my "dog that won't stop barking". I don't own a dog, my neighbour owns the noisy dog. She sent me a complaint as well. FML
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Top comments
QWERTYrage 3
"Good dick, who's a good dick?"
YoTengoTomatoes 7
What kind of name is "Dong" for a dog anyway?
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Comments (153)
QWERTYrage 3
"Good dick, who's a good dick?"
miguelswk 2
Hey penis!!!! Come inside penis!!!
SakataGintoki 9
"I don't want you catching a cold, Penis!"
howdeedoo 22
"Where's my little Penis?"
ohSNAPyall 27
.... We'll call him Beethoven.
bigtaytay 13
Penis! Get off the mailman!
klovemachine 24
How dare you leave that mess, penis!!
TML329 14
I love my penis,on Sunday nights I sit on the couch and do nothing but pet him
codyjohn17 5
Penis! Stop humping my leg!
seandoc 13
Penis looks so cute when he's asleep!
TML329 14
Penis gets excited every time someone comes over
B_CeouL 12
Oh penisss! Where arrree yoouuu...
Jdummer32 5
I used to love my penis... but then I had to put him down. :(
BlueFlatts 20
Come penis. Penis, get your ball.
tsent8 15
Penis quit drooling all over my girlfriend!!!
isallwaysme 27
hey girls, wanna come over and pet my penis?
brittanyrmh_ 12
"Please excuse the mess Penis left on the carpet, he's not trained yet."
agentx52 13
Penis pisses me off sometimes, slobbering everywhere.
codyjohn17 5
Penis play dead!
sens3sfailing 25
can somebody help me find my penis? he's a hairly little thing that loves to hump everything that moves.
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Does it look awkward when I yell "pussy" at my cats? Just roll with it, you know you love your little Dong, Op.
onlychildFTW 34
It's a bad name for a dog anyways.
gamercanadian 11
The comments on this fml are funnier than the actual fml itself.
tsent8 15
Hehe little dong. Not mans best friend anymore huh?
YoTengoTomatoes 7
What kind of name is "Dong" for a dog anyway?
stolencookie 17
"Dong" isn't the actual name, but what the name meant. OP was just using it as an example.
Puckfan21 2
Thank you. I was going to say the same thing.
Airman1988 9
Wow people need to brush up on their reading comprehension..
gc327072 31
This is getting upvotes? Wow....
murphdarkly 13
I think she was actually yelling poutsos, or something like that 'dong' was just her translating it to English.
dre9889 4
Now you know what the creepy people who show up at your doorstep want...
HKCgrimmjow 15
They want his dong... :D
actyankee 5
Your name identifies you dre.
ICastillo 25
That would be funny just hearing someone scream for penis everyday. It would make it that much funnier if you're a guy.
lilhellian 27
In otherwords middle school all over again?
grafeety 9
Middle school!? Maybe in high school but most people don't get the dong until high school
lilhellian 27
There was a 6th grader here who openly admitted to sex alot..
gc327072 31
No 46, the classic dare in middle school is to yell "PENIS!!" as loud as you can without getting caught.
smartman136 8
Lets be honest. Someone yelling penis without realizing it would make any aged man laugh a little.
yousuck44 11
You mean the penis game? Each person yell penis and at each turn you get louder.
grafeety 9
Oh my bad ahah. I prefer playing the bomb game on airplanes...
lilhellian 27
I feel like that game would get you shot and sent to some hole in midle of desert to rot..
kofeinisti 6
#52 - yes, because no teen/preteen has ever lied about their sexual experiences to seem more mature, cool, etc
robo_thunder 13
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I've heard that in reference to a penis before and I'm not greek.
CharresBarkrey 16
"Dong" isn't the name.
The_Tool1 13
That would be weird for them.. They just hear you yelling PENIS! PENIS!
Steve95401 49
If OP was a guy, I'd say that they're just yanking her 3rd leg about the dog's name.
Sir_ND_Pity 35
OP didn't know what was wrong, Until he found his dog's name was Dong. That was the problem all along. This is the end of my song.
OnlyAvailableID 28
If that was a concert I'd throw you my thong.
OnlyAvailableID 28
Haven't been on it for long.
Werken247 14
but it reeks pretty strong
Sir_ND_Pity 35
That stuff makes you go ape crazy, like King Kong
OnlyAvailableID 28
Sort of like a mong?
A7XCamaro 19
More like Cheech and Chong.
ManInTheMachine 20
I'd say she's too far gone.
klovemachine 24
Let me hit my gong!
lukep135 6
This whole thread is just wrong wrong, wrong!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Let's play ping pong!
B_CeouL 12
This just keeps going back and forth like pong
jellycorn 13
This thread is going for far too long
BryanThaMan 14
Although this comes in the form of two-prong time to finish the thread nice and strong
DynamicDave 11
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I don't think I've ever seen a thread get this far without a combo breaker.
VannahJane 17
Im curious as to how you named your dog
senbonzakura90 3
Where's Ding?
HKCgrimmjow 15
Dings his cat, and if ding isn't his cat. He's definitely doing it wrong