Today, my girlfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't follow her latest fad of becoming a goth, which involves dressing like an undertaker's haunted hearse and putting on eyeliner. Last week she was into Reggae and beanie hats. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, and since we met, my girlfriend has forced me to change my hair, clothing and jewellery, and my diet. She has changed basically everything about me. Then this morning she dumped me because I'm "not the guy she fell in love with a year ago". I'm not even upset because its too funny. FML
Today, my girlfriend decided to get a new haircut. Now, she hates the haircut and blames me for, in her words, "turning me into something I'm not." FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I was "changing too much." My big change was a haircut. FML
Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks gave me an ultimatum: marry her, or she kills herself. FML
Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I don't like her Facebook statuses enough. FML
Today, my mother threatened to disown me if I didn't break up with my tattooed girlfriend. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend of one week is suicidal and crazy about me. She showed me that she'd carved her old boyfriend's name in her arm, and she threatened suicide if I ever left her. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I "always wear that stupid little hat." I'm Jewish. FML
Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit at me because I laughed at her idea of getting the Cullen family tree tattooed on her back. FML
Today, my boyfriend had a tantrum because I didn't like Black Sabbath as much as him. Apparently our entire relationship was based on him thinking I did. I've now been labeled "The Queen of Lies." FML
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Top comments
faeynt 0
get a new gf :)
jsprackman 11
Maybe next she will dress like elton john
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Comments (316)
pleasebitch_fml 0
Someone has trouble making up her mind
AntiHero1317 8
Might I ask why you havent dumped her yet?
sydneyhorny 0
Sounds like a physco bitch... haha.
brock329 3
Agreed!!!
JinxosGirl87 0
Gotta love guyliner! She gave you an outlet, take it and run!
Petertheman 0
Leave her for someone who had there minds mad up.
omggtfomi 1
I think you mean "made up" learn to spell
Cmdr_Shepard 17
Dude, if you don't want to follow her fads, then just man up and tell her. If she dumps you, then so be it. She's trying to emotionally blackmail you into doing whatever she wants and if you let her, it'll be the first step to getting pussywhipped.
loserman67 36
So she wants to become Goth this week, then onto: the next week: a furry (get a bear outfit and have some freaky sex) the week after: a punk rocker (If she becomes Courtney Love get set for tons of anal) the week after: a disco queen (COOL, ludes and blow jobs all week) the week after: a **** star (hang around for that week) the week after: a sadist (stay away that week) the week after: a masochist (be there for this week and get your jollies) the week after: a dominatrix (time to break up unless you like being beaten) the week after: a man (if she calls herself Chaz run for your life) This could go on and on for years. Do you like Merry-Go-Rounds, if not, get off now
NPN_Scorpio 16
You owe me for: 1 pair of shorts ruptured from laughing to your comment,
Graawr 7
Why are you dating her again? :|
ms_YoungMula 8
Don't be a follower like she is
alice18_fml 6
how old is she?