Kevin
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I "always wear that stupid little hat." I'm Jewish. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
heartbroken
Canada
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, all because whenever I laugh I say "lol." FML
athlete47
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I was "changing too much." My big change was a haircut. FML
meach
United States
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because of a bad haircut. She was the one who cut my hair. FML
Anonymous
Know your worth
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, because I was apparently "too good" for her. FML
Keith
I never thought this happened in real life
Today, and since we met, my girlfriend has forced me to change my hair, clothing and jewellery, and my diet. She has changed basically everything about me. Then this morning she dumped me because I'm "not the guy she fell in love with a year ago". I'm not even upset because its too funny. FML
Anonymous
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she believes I "jinxed" her chances of getting the job she wanted. FML
aabadaba
La Mirada, United States
Today, my Jewish boyfriend came over for my extended family's Easter party. My grandmother made fun of him for being Jewish so badly, that he left, crying. She doesn't see what she did wrong. FML
dykerino
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Vancouver, Canada
Fellas, is it gay to date a woman?
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I cut my hair short and he didn't want people to think he was gay. FML
single and hatless
Wilmington, United States
Today, my 2 year relationship ended when my boyfriend accused me of stealing his beanie hat. FML
B-Rad
United States
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out I share a birthday with a fictional character who is "untrustworthy" and has a "dark side", so therefore I can't be trusted either. FML
Top comments
Sinshine 28
Better now than later. She doesn't seem the kind you'd want around.
RichardPencil 32
Oy gevalt, you schmuck! If you’re so frum, what are you doing with a shikse who doesn’t know what a yarmulke is? Nu?!?! May she grow like an onion, with her head in the ground! Find yourself a nice, Jewish girl and hak mir nisht keyn tchainik!
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Comments (12)
Sinshine 28
Better now than later. She doesn't seem the kind you'd want around.
RichardPencil 32
Oy gevalt, you schmuck! If you’re so frum, what are you doing with a shikse who doesn’t know what a yarmulke is? Nu?!?! May she grow like an onion, with her head in the ground! Find yourself a nice, Jewish girl and hak mir nisht keyn tchainik!
ViviMage 40
Hahah! I'm like 4th or 5th generation from the Cossack Pogoms before WWII, and I can read this! It's great! Usually you're a schmuck here. But right now you're just a schmendrick!
Vern Ehlers 5
Maybe she really likes bacon, and shellfish, and mixing meat and dairy.
BurnInDemonFire 39
Jesus Christ... Oh, sorry. He's not your guy, is he?
ViviMage 40
Jesus was Jewish too! He'd understand the little hat!
BurnInDemonFire 39
He may have been Jewish, but I've yet to meet a Jewish person who considered him their Messiah, which is the angle I was going for.
BurnInDemonFire 39
Oh, and Jesus wasn't real, anyway. So that, too.
Lucky O'Guin 18
If you're stupid enough to date someone who doesn't even know what a yarmulke is, ydi.
Yudith 28
Dude, where I come from, we call them "kippa". I didn't know what a yarmulke was until someone suggested to fry them, and there's a big Jewish community in my hometown.
IAmClay 24
This exact one was posted a couple years ago
JillianJuneBug 39
I noticed that, and someone else did too but it appears that their comment is no longer available... hmm...