Today, my roommate demanded that I dance naked for him as a birthday present. When I declined, he offered to pay me. When I declined again, he stormed off to pout in his room and played really loud depressing music. We're both guys and I have 11 months left on my lease with him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my housemate got back at me for asking for her share of a bill by losing her virginity to the guy I like, very loudly. FML
Today, my roommate and I were watching TV, and he ordered a pizza. After it was delivered, I took a slice. He yelled at me for taking his food and told me to stop mooching off him. I had to cover his rent last month and he still hasn't paid me back. FML
Today, I received a call from a potential employer. I was excited, until my roommate starts loudly moaning sexually in the background. The interviewer got offended and hung up. My roommate did it because I "made her" pay my half of the rent this month. FYI, I’m unemployed. FML
Today, my boyfriend of eleven months broke up with me, but adamantly insisted I didn't move out of our apartment, because he can't pay the rent alone. FML
Today, my roommate played a crazy April Fool's joke on me by not paying his rent this month. Good one. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, claiming moving in was a bad idea and he is the type who needs his privacy. It was his idea to move in, he had to convince me. Now we are stuck, under lease together for the next 6 months. FML
Today, my best friend and roommate has decided to "stop being controlled by society" while at home. This involves him walking around naked, masturbating whenever he wants, and not cleaning up his guys. I've stepped in it three times already. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend what he wanted for for his birthday in a couple of days. He replied "to be single" and walked out of the room. FML
Today, I was sleeping when my roommate walked in and asked me, "So… when are you leaving?" She had decided to throw a party in our apartment. I wasn't invited. FML
Today, my roommate informed me that I need to move out, due to me having sex with his boyfriend. Even though he gave us permission, and told us to use protection. FML
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Top comments
gusgus36 5
Well, that will be a fun 11 months...
imustbeinsane 2
how much money are we talking about?
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Comments (196)
Amrel 10
Cool beans bro whats wrong sounds normal?
loserman67 36
I say pack your shit and leave - oh wait, HE probably packed your shit last night, so all you have to do is leave.....
TheHoboWerewolf 0
Eh, it's his B-Day OP. Humor him! Haha! just playin. But I would advise you to run...very fast.
jobsman99 0
which of you had the erection during this?
bigbisawesome 0
Both lol
jaff23 11
Lock him in his room
CDigital_32 0
He might like that.
Ibeatmyself 3
Im pretty sure ur roommate wants to b more than roommates
metalhead5564 0
Wow. How did you come to that conclusion?
Gandalf004 7
so whats the best that could happen? free *******? Just close your eyes and pretend he's a girl! J/K That's seriously ****** up, not just because he's gay it would have also been just as bad if they were opposite sex roommates.
TheHolyLama 0
Maybe you could just but him some videos of naked people dancing? :p
ladyreal420 3
if I was you I would be very very scared to sleep. I think he may be coming out of the closet
dpricenator 1
Dude, he would have totally given you a hummer. You missed out.....lol