Today, I was the first guy ever to give my girlfriend an orgasm. I was also the first guy to make her poop at the same time. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had my first astounding orgasm, during which I simultaneously shat myself and vomited. I'm so thankful my new partner was present. FML
Today, I made my new girlfriend orgasm for the first time. All she said after was "I drooled a little". FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time only to realise she squeals like a baby pig in the process. FML
Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I did a 69 for the first time and I was on the bottom. When she orgasmed, not only did she fart, a bit of poo came out with the fart, and actually went up my nose. I’ve gone through a whole box of tissues blowing my nose, but I can still smell it. FML
Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend. Unfortunately, afterwards I had a terrible tummy ache and let out a very noisy fart. I'm not sure she'll still be my girlfriend tomorrow. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She had her whole hand in me kind of deep. It was hitting everything inside me and triggered me to poop a little bit, on her arm and the bed. FML
Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she wanted me to be her first and last...with plenty of people in between. FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time. She's a screamer. Her dog must have thought I was attacking her, because he immediately came over and started savaging me. FML
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Top comments
cdgrayson 21
Damn you must be the shit!
BellaP13 24
It happens. Basically everything tights and then loosens. Don't worry about it she's probably as embarrassed as you
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Comments (154)
Badkarma4u 17
That's incorrect 110. Many times after a woman has squirted. They still can use the bathroom and their bladders are fuĺl. Also when a woman squirts often a mans nose and mouth are in close proximity. You get a mouthful. You know what it tasts like. If you make a woman ****** enough times, you will eventually end up with a drop or two of pee in your mouth. The taste is totally different. There is no mistaking it.
theFickleFinger 24
I call the name "Sex Poop" for my heavy metal band!
pasupathymuthu 16
Hearty congratulations. She will remember you for the rest of her life. You are building your legacy!!
kalbrek009 20
120, you are correct. My woman & I have been together for over 6 years. I was the 1st one to give her a squirting ****** (I've had other gf who did as well) & she has multiple of these every time we are together in bed. It's definitely not urine & yes, you can tell the difference. Pay no mind to the ignorant so called "know what they're talking about" people so site "scientific studies"..they probably got that info from trolls on yahoo answers. Lol
tiredofwaiting 25
Holy shit.
fonkimonki 7
Don't be, or make her, embarrassed about this -it was obviously a full-on ******, and you should be glad to have been part of it with her. Maybe next time, stick your finger up her ass?
wanttobe 8
poop but not pee? idk that you're doing it right
Badkarma4u 17
Hookers are just people, dude. They can feel whatever they feel.
Kaaykuwatzuu 13
Damn... ****** the shit out of her
lostinareverie 21
Well I guess you give explosive orgasms then.