Today, for the very first time I got it on with my girlfriend. Unfortunately, afterwards I had a terrible tummy ache and let out a very noisy fart. I'm not sure she'll still be my girlfriend tomorrow. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while getting intimate with my girlfriend, I felt a sharp pain in my stomach, and had to run to the bathroom to evacuate my bowels. She heard the horrible sounds, and I doubt I'll ever be able to seduce her again. FML
Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML
Today, was the day my girlfriend and I tried to 69 for the first time. Today is also the day I learned that I'm physically incapable of maintaining an erection after someone farts in my face. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML
Today, I went to meet my boyfriend's parents for the first time. While I was at their house I got a tummy ache, then had loud explosive diarrhea. Twice. They definitely heard it all. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
Today, my girlfriend and I did a 69 for the first time and I was on the bottom. When she orgasmed, not only did she fart, a bit of poo came out with the fart, and actually went up my nose. I’ve gone through a whole box of tissues blowing my nose, but I can still smell it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML
Today, I shat myself in front of my girlfriend's family, after drinking too much the previous night and waking up with major stomach problems. FML
Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML
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Top comments
UGADAWG34 0
she's a **** if she leaves you for that...
SillyAsh 0
I'm sure if she really wanted to be your girl, she wouldn't dump you for farting. I fart after sex and in the mornings with my boyf. It's not a big deal.
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Comments (116)
UGADAWG34 0
she's a **** if she leaves you for that...
starwarsguy330 0
totally!
stef108 3
Agreed
Dilwann 27
I don't get why people make such a big deal out of farting nowadays >.<
MilkyFilmz 26
I don't really understand either, I mean, EVERYONE does it.
fuzzbutt 0
My boyfriend and I play the doorknob / safety game all the time! http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=safety+game
SillyAsh 0
I'm sure if she really wanted to be your girl, she wouldn't dump you for farting. I fart after sex and in the mornings with my boyf. It's not a big deal.
amandajlucas2015 2
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
First of all ur tummy hurt?? How bout be an adult and say stomach second it's just a fart.. If she doesn't find it funny or if she can't just ignore em then she's too uptight and no fun anyways
samir1996 0
Why do you reply to the OP by replying to one of the comments? I see people doing this all the time and I don't understand it.
robotiick7 23
94- it's to get their comment up to near the top so it will be noticed
laurades8 0
How long have you even been going out? And not to be mean but seriously, what guy says 'tummy ache' anymore? o.o Besides that. It's no big deal. I'd think it was actually kinda cute. Your human. no getting around that. So don't worry, <3
ladybuggirl1234 3
I'm sorry but how is that kinda cute??
jennaleighhh 0
well, good thing you didnt fart WHILE you were having sex.
k_tumble 0
Well then she's not worth it, everybody farts.
KPSM 0
tummy? what the hell man
Leviathan_fml 0
gotta hold it in man
pinkfrenchrose 5
"Tummy ache?" ROFL
blueyedgrl0108 0
hahaha some girls don't care