Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time only to realise she squeals like a baby pig in the process. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm for the first time. She's a screamer. Her dog must have thought I was attacking her, because he immediately came over and started savaging me. FML
Today, my girlfriend started making pig noises during sex. FML
Today, I made my new girlfriend orgasm for the first time. All she said after was "I drooled a little". FML
Today, I was the first guy ever to give my girlfriend an orgasm. I was also the first guy to make her poop at the same time. FML
Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML
Today, I read an article with tips on how to give girls full-body orgasms and I decided to test a few on my girlfriend. Instead of having a mind-blowing orgasm, she started cackling and said I looked like a giraffe trying to bob for apples. FML
Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML
Today, me and my girlfriend were riding on my motorcycle. While at a stop light, she started to make these weird noises. Turns out she was having an orgasm. I still can't give her one. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to stick her finger up my ass during sex. I screamed like a little girl and barely managed to finish. Afterward, she said, 'Now you know how it feels.' FML
Today, while playing a game, my girlfriend told a bunch of our friends that she's never had an orgasm. News to me. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
"Today, I satisfied my woman. FML" REALLY?
mintcar 10
At least you gave her an ****** OP.
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Comments (58)
mintcar 10
At least you gave her an ****** OP.
rakooligan 11
Too true.
unhappybitch 8
I don't get people , they complain when they can't give orgasms , and when they do they ALSO complain. WTF!
Trupe 3
I know right? Better than having her yawning cause you didn't....
iSitt 0
you da man, Kermit. at least you know she didn't fake it.
mfmylifesrsly 30
I agree 31! but I do agree when I watch **** it can be annoying when the girls have annoying/weird moans lol but if it's someone I'd care about I'd love it because it's what they do
SchiTzenGiglez 0
I find it equally annoying when men do that in **** as well, moanin like there's no tomorrow and shit... ugh. or when they get right in the guys face, *shudders*
enoughgrace 4
and?
missbreann 0
well...as long as she enjoyed it.... ;)
FriscoKidz 10
Stop complaining and give her another one you selfish pig lol. But congratz
SchiTzenGiglez 0
2nd^^ congrats ma man. you don't suck at givin what she needs. you're doin better than most posters on FML at least
Rynk95 11
You might start calling her Miss Piggy from now on.
vita987 0
do that and youll never get laid again
ZoZo17_fml 0
well, then.
instnt1nfction 17
then don't have sex with your baby
whiteboy7thst 2
...pig
iluvhobos 5
ah, you're from Canada, that explains it all.
nebula748 14
and only 14...
Prolux_fml 23
54 - What does being Canadian have to do with anything?
rattusrattus 19
I'm sure you make equally disturbing noises and/or faces when you ******, OP. It's not really a time for restraint, control and decorum, is it?
nebula748 14
fukkin this
allmidnighteyes 11
"Today, I satisfied my woman. FML" REALLY?
PsySygirl 0
well it may as well be an FML for some :)
rawrgle 7
Brand New
Person1233 13
Just think of the bacon that can be made...