dumped
Canada
Double dump
Today, my girlfriend haltingly dumped me over the phone. Faint splashes punctuated her grunting, straining sounds. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Qu?bec, Canada
Today, my girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me by taping a breakup note to my doorstep and ding-dong-ditching me. FML
musicyman55
United States
Today, my girlfriend who I love very deeply dumped me two times, over the phone. The first time was to dump me. She then called me back a couple hours later explicitly to dump our friendship. I was just friend dumped. FML
CHStennis_4
United States
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
fucklife
Washington, United States
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she heard me say "love you" on the phone. I was talking to my mom. FML
yesguysgetabusedtoo
Papamoa, New Zealand
It's for the best
Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML
kukadaman
United States
Today, I came home to hear my girlfriend break up with me, over the answering machine, with my entire family in the room. FML
whysheheartless
United States
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
dharp7
United States
Today, my girlfriend dumped me. Her exact words used were "I like the idea of you, but I don't like you." I still don't know what that means. FML
Afroman720
United States
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because her dog "told her to". FML
ddll
Singapore
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend. She responded by sitting on the floor, crying like a baby and screaming "WHY?" at strangers. FML
Top comments
Gurljuice 0
She doubled her relief
sassypants93 17
That sounds like she got a big dumping in more ways than one.
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Comments (236)
andrewb261 0
She haltingly dumped you?
skorpien 1
Yes, as in her speech was halted every time she strained with her dump.
bbygirlsmiles 0
two dumps at one time , what a multitasker -___- .. sorry OP
skorpien 1
Well, shit… Could be worse though, it could've been a Face Time call…
hosson 0
it must have been a "shitty" relationship then. but that does suck. I feel bad for u op.
jessluvezsam 0
ewww! lol that's so gross!!!
64ponygirl 1
double dump.
malisa916 7
She dumped you while she took a dumpy?! Well she's a classy one.
aback 5
She wanted to illustrate the point.
Forever_Blue_Jay 0
Everyone has already made all the good poop jokes. oh yea sorry about that. that's some terrible shit.
amazing_j 1
Guess that relationship is flushed.