Congratulations
Today, for our third anniversary, I gave my boyfriend a watch, courtesy of Rolex. He gave me herpes, courtesy of his other girlfriend. FML
Today, for our third anniversary, I gave my boyfriend a watch, courtesy of Rolex. He gave me herpes, courtesy of his other girlfriend. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, for our third anniversary, I gave my fiancée a necklace she always wanted. She gave me herpes. FML
Today, it was my boyfriend and mine's six-month anniversary. I've really fallen in love with him, and I know he loves me the same, so I got him a really nice gift, a watch he's had his eye on for as long as I've known him. It was expensive. What did he get me? A condom. Three actually. FML
Today, I found out my boyfriend gave me a surprise birthday present: herpes. FML
Today, I bought my boyfriend a gold watch for our 2 year anniversary. He bought me a jar of Nutella. FML
Today, I surprised my boyfriend by buying him an expensive watch for his birthday. He responded with "Aww, you could've just given me head, babe." FML
Today, for my two-year anniversary I got my girlfriend a very expensive diamond necklace. She got me male enhancement pills. FML
Today, my boyfriend of three years hooked up with a girl who got herpes from a Michigan football player. FML
Today, my boyfriend, who I have been seeing for a year, decided to tell me that he has herpes and has not taken any precautions to stop it from passing on. We have had unprotected sex quite a lot over the last year, so now I most likely have herpes too. FML
Today, as a 1 year anniversary present, my boyfriend let me see and wear my engagement ring. He then made me give it back at the end of the day. FML
Today, my boyfriend lied about having herpes, and used it as an excuse to dump me. FML
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Top comments
Tsunami87 17
Ironically both of those things are timeless
thebeanishere 8
What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas except herpes that shit will follow you.
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Comments (187)
TransitionCovert 6
What a douche! Take the Rolex back and give him a Casio instead!
Sonic_boomerang 5
Or don't give him anything but a breakup unless OP is down with him having another girlfriend?
ReesesPuffs 0
He should be given a kick to the balls.
fatgirllovesfml 0
You know what's weird? That all 3 comments above me has animal pictures! Except one who killed the poor piggy to satisfy his fat ass! bastard. K bye!
Sonic_boomerang 5
So weird
itchy_arse 0
Your name is fat girl and your picture is about tacos
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
53- Your picture is a fat girl. What's your point?
Keyman1212 14
Damn, 52, the girl in your picture is so fat, she actually has a single chin because it swallowed all the others.
franticravyn 7
Don't eat FML.com fatgirl D:
The_Troller 14
Lmao 52 privates her profile so we can't see
Driveshaft 5
Well the rolex will eventually break, but herpes is forever...sounds like you got the better gift! FYL
FarSide 23
That was so courteous of Rolex!
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
81- I guess she was the fat girl from the picture... I thought it was just making fun of someone, like my picture does to batman... Nope. Sorry, 52.
fatgirllovesfml 0
Hahahahahaha
mrpipp 0
Hahahahahha you have herpes
tjv3 10
herpes the gift that keeps giving
leelaV 4
Screw the watch you should just cut his dick off. He's an asshole
thebeanishere 8
What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas except herpes that shit will follow you.
sky13_fml 4
Awww. That's aweful.
hammy90 0
Hangover quote ftw!!!
TheDeadlyTurtle 7
Herpes the gift that keeps on giving.
RavenRiley007 4
kill him.
kevint9911 15
And credit card bills
SolanumX 6
And that's misspelled.
Tsunami87 17
Ironically both of those things are timeless
alpaquette91 9
Eh a watch has time ...
skata 4
3- herpes, the gift that keeps on giving
hottiebrunette 0
Your icon is very true
CookieMonstr19 0
I like those butterflies in the background of ur profile pic....
every1luvsboners 11
You gave he a watch. He gave you the gift that keeps on giving. I'd say that you're the winner here.
PhillyEagles 0
You're a ****** and you're not funny.
brunogtz 4
having herpes is winning? i don't think so
Adorlee 11
You`re lame.
NEEPLES 7
In case you dont know. Every1lovesboners is ALWAYS. ALWAYS. Sarcastic.
SkardeyKat 3
Hey, I thought it was funny. His watch will break someday. Her herpes will be with her forever.
evilscorpi 29
u might want to take that watch back....sorry op 0_o
raphanne_fml 33
That sucks. I would say SEXchange it and get a refund but well.... With this kind of present...
NoobHat 6
This comment will fall under the category, 'When Puns Go Wrong'.
Notimetobleed 14
Noobhat your profile pic looks like Bubbles from Trailer park boys mixed with star wars!
raphanne_fml 33
Time to go hang myself in shame...
Notimetobleed 14
^ I can say the same thing
FreshlyCut 0
Notimetobleed I've never seen one of your comments that was actually 0 or higher so please go away.
Notimetobleed 14
Sad to say neither have I (thumb me down I honestly do not care, I won't ever meet anyone on this sight and dont want too) Buh-bye!
stormchaser24 24
Wow a $7000 watch for your boyfriend. Dang. Try something cheaper next time.
slick5880 22
Like the clap.
_Oblivion_ 12
$7000 is somewhat cheap for a Rolex depending on the model.
muffins650 1
I'm cheap, give me a *******. F**k a watch
slick5880 22
******* with a side of herpes? You have fun with that. I'll pass.
AshleighNason 24
Agreed.
Sadist86 6
In time, that watch may lose luster, and degenerate in quality. Herpes will stay with you forever!!
hateevryone 15
take that watch back and dump his ass
tnlander 20
At least one of you can return your gift.
HomeAl0ne 20
Yeah, she can't return the herpes because she doesn't have the box it came in.