Today, for my two-year anniversary I got my girlfriend a very expensive diamond necklace. She got me male enhancement pills. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, for our 2-year anniversary, I bought my girlfriend a beautiful $400 necklace. She bought me a pink $5 shirt of Elton John riding a piano through space. FML
Today, I bought my girlfriend a very expensive necklace. I gave it to her thinking she'd be extremely happy. Instead she was mad at me because my gift for our anniversary was better than hers. FML
Today, for our third anniversary, I gave my fiancée a necklace she always wanted. She gave me herpes. FML
Today, I gave a girl I like a $200 diamond necklace to express how much she means to me. She gave me a hug and told me she didn't want to lose me as a friend. Nor did she want to lose her new necklace. Today, I got a $200 hug. FML
Today, on my 11-year anniversary with my wife, I bought her a nice necklace and we went to an Indian restaurant where we had the most sensational banquet meal. When we got home, I suggested we made love, to which she replied, "I don't like you enough to do that." FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out for dinner to a fancy Italian restaurant for our one year anniversary. After giving her some roses, freshly baked cookies, and a thoughtful poem I wrote for her, she started laughing and asked for her real gift. FML
Today, I bought my boyfriend a gold watch for our 2 year anniversary. He bought me a jar of Nutella. FML
Today, it was my boyfriend and mine's six-month anniversary. I've really fallen in love with him, and I know he loves me the same, so I got him a really nice gift, a watch he's had his eye on for as long as I've known him. It was expensive. What did he get me? A condom. Three actually. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend about a diamond necklace I bought her for her birthday, which she didn't seem to be wearing. She then told me she hocked it to pay for her inexpensive phone bill. I paid $1,500 for that necklace, she received $300 from the pawn shop. FML
Today, is my five year anniversary. My boyfriend said he was gonna get me something shiny this year. I thought he was gonna propose. He got me a set of sparkle glue. FML
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Top comments
ChaosZirconia 0
...bitch.
Brown5922 0
ohhh haha nice gift from you... but i guess your not performing well?
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Comments (123)
XIII_fml 0
LOLOL
genius_man16 1
You should have told her that your dick isn't small, her ****** is huge.
ohsnapp823 0
84... HAHAHA! THAT IS FUNNY
Sethlikesgirls 0
lucky you
ooitastic 0
you see, she got you something that you needed
z620 0
She's not necessarily saying it's small, but that she wants it to be bigger. Even if I had a foot long I wouldn't mind it being bigger.
ams_fml 0
well, you should thank her it's a thoughtful gift :)
Thebluez 0
and use it too. there's a reason u got that
Brown5922 0
ohhh haha nice gift from you... but i guess your not performing well?
LLLP 0
No he obviously is and the pills she got him are just a joke. Geez.
GameRater01 0
lol that she'd think they'd work
alex_vik 1
Too bad they don't do jack squat.
kaliko808at702 0
too bad you know that first hand. I sense animosity... OP: enzyte win
cp2292 0
Tots your fault, Have a bigger penis if you dont want things like this to happen
tuxedoandex 28
hey #6 how about you try controlling your penis size? tell us all how it works out
Miguel83 8
I thought he was being sarcastic
Blank_fml 0
now you know what to get her next year ^_^
jakelesnake 0
perhaps she wanted a pearl necklace instead?
ChaosZirconia 0
...bitch.
sexygirl123 0
lmao that sucks, well at least u'll be better in bed.