Today, while performing a rectal exam on my female patient, I inadvertently said, "Okay, you're going to feel some pleasure now." I meant "pressure". Her husband was in the room. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was very tense as I sat in the chair for my gyno appointment, so the doctor repeatedly told me to relax, in order for her to do the routine exam. I then overcompensated and relaxed so much, I accidentally farted in her face. FML
Today, I went to have a breast exam. The doc told me that she would touch different parts of my breasts, and said to tell her if at any point it felt painful. As she was examining me, I was going to say that it wasn't painful, but instead I blurted out, "It feels good." FML
Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML
Today, I got prostate examination for the first time. Now I can't decide what's worse, the fact that I got a boner when the doctor inserted his finger, or the fact that my wife told the story to pretty much everybody we know. FML
Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to help me get over the fear of my upcoming rectal exam by surprising me with one of her own halfway through our lovemaking. FML
Today, I was at work. I had a male patient expose himself to me. He then apologized and said he thought that's what I wanted. FML
Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I are having some fertility problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said, "Mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML
Today, I was at the doctor's office and the doctor asked me, "Have you been having any intimate relations?" and the first thing that I blurted out was, "You mean with other people?" FML
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Top comments
Miss_Kristen 10
Giggity
brndnzchry 1
Did he then pleasure you with a rectal exam of his own?
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Comments (116)
thebeanishere 8
I bet the husband didn't want to go in there anyway.
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
At least you warned her..
blahhesucks 0
& then shee Moaned . . .
ReesesPuffs 0
LIAR
chaoticxxxmess 3
Tell him it was a Freudian slip. Because it was.
SCREAM4meeee 0
Exactly why I love rectal exams :)
rawrkittyrawr 6
That's a * puts on sunglasses * Shitty situation AHHHHHHHHHHH YEAAAAAAAAAA
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
*Sigh*.... Who invited that guy^^^
bfsd42 20
My question is, why was the husband there for a rectal exam?
Keyman1212 14
And then you found a coke bottle in there.
rawrkittyrawr 6
I'm sorry for the pun I couldn't stop myself it's a infectious disease :(
Hockeyboy4280 18
*an infectious disease
Damn_Hippster 11
Surprise butt-sex!! And during a rectal exam, who would have guessed?
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
79- That sounds like the plot of a cheap porno. Wife goes for rectal exam, husband comes to watch but ends up doing more then just that...
DynamicDave 11
What an asshole!
acethehusky 0
grammer Notzee!!! lol I know how to spell Nazi and grammar I'm just mocking you, because I love being an ass.. xD
MaCOOLiT 5
Did u find my keys?
ShyAnn29 15
Rectal exams aren't pleasant, I've had one before
ShakeMeDown 12
73 - I thought bastard posted this at first.
11jackson11 0
Honestly, I think people correct grammar because they aren't intelligent enough to contribute to the conversation.
doctorwhogirl 0
and I bet she felt that pleasure you dog ;)
LindseyLunatic 8
Freudian slip: when you say one thing and mean your mother.
punkin_26 16
211- it's been said quite a few times now. Find some new material.
LindseyLunatic 8
Yeah. I agree that the fruedian slip comment gets old after a million times but it was actually a comment to the other person who had already said it. A bad joke because the "your mother" part would be a slip. Hee hee ha ha. Ill shut up now and stop posting things others have said. Sorry. Just thought it was funny /:)
Humanspider 18
Everything involving a doctor's visit seems like a porno. I hate you Brazzers!
Miss_Kristen 10
Giggity
enonymous 9
I would marry you for this comment on this fml alone
tanneriscool 2
Calm down old top... Wait and she will come to you :D
bitchslapped22 14
and she's hot :D
Coolguyt2 0
Haha I love the word giggity. (: I get to marry her
Miss_Kristen 10
Haha thanks guys ;)
muffins650 1
56, agreed.
torijeanne198705 4
Giggity giggity goo :)
zombicidal 11
^^ shut up Meg
sematariux 7
106 you made me damn near roll outta my seat in laughter And 16 Yeah cuz it's not Like she's really hot alone anyways ;) Haha
ckr911 5
I love how that other chick is trying to steal 2's attention...
brussell00 0
I agree with you!
auriane_fml 19
@2 you like a prettier version of amy lee from evanescence.
samhw 2
LOL
zombicidal 11
131 it is impossible to be hotter than
Grouse 5
that was well put
SneakyMuffin 0
Darn, first enonymous, now you? Is there no room for the muffin? :(
starburst7596 14
There's always room in polygamy.
SemperFi_23 6
Miss_Kristen, may I have your hand in marriage?
brndnzchry 1
Did he then pleasure you with a rectal exam of his own?
iFizzgig 11
With his foot? :D
NEEPLES 7
^^^^Hahahahhahaha. No.
DrewsFML 8
It was just an innocent slip of the tongue. No wait, that's what he did next.
j_cat187 20
Toss salad? Kinky.
every1luvsboners 11
If both of your hands weren't on her waist you should be fine.
zattele 3
This^
chaoticxxxmess 3
That^
Enslaved 38
Paddywack
False_Stupidity 42
^ it's give a dog a Boners... :)
Anubyte 0
This old man cum rolling home...
bitchslapped22 14
42 ruined a Combo Breaker
Shorty979 0
Lol
43trauts 14
48 is pure win
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
42- it was funny up till u ruined it...
ndvorsky 4
Actually 42 WAS the combo breaker
AaronTkr 0
why you gotta go around ****** shit up, 42.
tellithowitis 13
Is it bad that I laughed hysterically after seeing two commenters with cats in their pictures? Yes
JiggaJayZ 16
No it's not bad.. Cats are BOSS
screamo_neve 12
All of this just made me laugh :D
evilscorpi 29
just say sorry and say what u ment..if he laughs it off fine if not just do ur job
HeartAndSoul2011 0
Do the job and give her some pleasure ;)
iimaxipad 3
Reminds me of the scrubs moment when Elliot does the pelvic exam
djmigues 7
Watching Scrubs right now.
CryMoreFMLs 15
Like we really cared #41.
raphanne_fml 33
Oops, you kind of made an ass of yourself :D
vonRosen 6
More like he made it in the ass using himself :)
aliceb2255 0
another pun !
Rdvlvt 0
sounds like a shitty situation....
nicknamekenny 1
Lol
Bulzye 2
That's a shitty pun...
mismonroe 0
I thought it was punny..
neonberries 15
This isn't an FML, this is just win!
pfx2_fml 15
That must of been awkward..
malignantmegan 3
I think your cloud needs a rectal exam :O
tnlander 20
Way to stick it to her.