Today, two children decided it would be fun to try to ding-dong-ditch me. I never answered the door as I saw them running away. They did it a couple of times before getting bored. That's when they decided it would be fun to come into my house instead. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I set up a motion-activated sprinkler to drench the neighborhood kids who have been ding dong ditching me for years. Because they couldn't get close enough to ring the doorbell, they decided to start egging me instead. FML
Today, in the spirit of Halloween and to get back at a child who repeatedly pressed the doorbell until I showed up, I quickly opened the door and yelled "Boo!" The child ended up being carried away crying with wet pants by a mother threatening to sue. FML
Today, I was visiting my girlfriend at her house. We heard the door bell ring. She told me to jump out the window thinking it was her dad. I jumped, landed wrong, and got hurt. It turns out we were ding-dong-ditched. FML
Today, I was baby sitting ten year old twins. When they first saw me, they ran away screaming and hid in the closet. This isn't the first house where this has happened. FML
Today, my five-year-old daughters realized that if one of them rang the doorbell, it would keep me distracted long enough for the other one to steal cookies from the kitchen. FML
Today, my neighbor's sons decided it would be funny to throw rocks at my house. I went outside to scold them and saw my other neighbors gathered around, watching. They didn't stop them because they thought I wasn't home. FML
Today, my 4-year-old twin sons discovered how to lock doors. They locked me out of the house while I was taking out the trash. I had to climb through the kitchen window, which they'd generously smeared with peanut butter. FML
Today, I got stumped by a childproof door. Twice. FML
Today, I went upstairs to scold my boys for running in the house because someone could get hurt. As I turned around to come back downstairs I tripped and fell all the way down to the landing at the bottom. I could hear them laughing in their rooms. FML
Today, while up in my room getting ready to go out, I thought I heard some trick or treaters knocking on the door. I ignored them because I didn't have any candy. The knocking got louder and longer. I walked downstairs, and noticed that the living room ceiling was falling down onto the floor. FML
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Top comments
ViktoriaaKills 13
Ever thought about locking your doors?
MattThePimp 10
Children are the 9/11 of humans.
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Comments (130)
MattThePimp 10
Children are the 9/11 of humans.
barakados 11
....What?
SystemofaBlink41 27
So 9/11 was a 9/11 to what...?
lengi123 18
9/11
xxrogerthatxx 19
You naive community of FML. These kids weren't ding dong ditching, they were checking to see if someone was home to burgurlarize it.
incoherentrmblr 22
They're in your home now. Do what you want, it's your move...
dragonrider1959 18
While I agree that is a possibility it could also be the case that they were playing a prank. The world may never know
j_cat187 20
j_cat187 20
j_cat187 20
fml broke anti-flood
xxrogerthatxx 19
No, the world may never know but we do. It wasn't a prank.
DropTheDaggerxx 31
74, it went past the point of "prank" and morphed into home invasion/breaking and entering. I hope you let those kids know that is NOT okay, OP! I hope they were young... even then, any child old enough to figure out how to sneak into a house should be old enough to know better.
xxrogerthatxx 19
at 97... THEY WEREN'T EFFIN SNEAKING! They wanted to see if anyone was home! No prank involved what so ever! Zip Nada Zilch! Ain't no way around it!
Maxgolub 13
At 98: You need to calm your shit dude
ViktoriaaKills 13
Ever thought about locking your doors?
RenoTheRhino 30
I live in a small town, and our doors are only locked at night. I don't think OP expected them to barge in, so there was probably no thought to lock the door.
Soviet_American 29
Well that's a little odd? Never heard of Ding Dong Break In..
HarleyQuinn1996 8
It's a new sensation that's sweeping the nation
Zebediabolical 45
I heard it's the new challenge to raise money and awareness for ASBO sufferers!
184886837272837 32
If you live in a nice area you shouldn't have to lock your door while you're home
marcus369 9
58, your like my friends long lost twin, its really weird
False_Stupidity 42
I don't know that Liverpool counts as a "nice area" though.
onlychildFTW 34
No matter how big or small a place you live in. You should always lock your doors if you live in a house. The only time I think it's okay to leave a door unlocked is if you live in a condo, have the whole floor to yourself, and a FOB is required for the door and elevator. You never know when that 1 bad person in the small nice community will come on over to your house.
lickastick 27
you could answer the door naked
tony1891 22
now thats just downright stupid. end up in prison over that.
CrAzYELF4 26
I don't think you would get arrested for that. As long as your in your house u can be naked.
Respect101 17
Yeah but what if the kids were like. The man made me touch him in his no no spot. Adults believe kids over adults.
moonbootz 7
Indecent exposure to minors is a huge no no,whether ur inside ur home or not. its 2014 cant do that...dads a lawyer,trust me.
mattlikesfunions 22
-snip-
Christakwon 7
They shouldn't be knocking on the damn doors anyway. Is just wear a gruesome mask and scare there ass. As far as coming in the house, they're asking for an ass whopping and I'd hold them and demand their parents numbers.
CHUBBYninja 18
I remember ding dong ditching. We did it until we got held at gun point. One of the scariest moments of my life.
junkman6 22
I think having a gun in the UK is more of a crime than breaking and entering! I was thinking along the lines of scaring them shitless with a shotgun myself, until I saw this was in the UK.
tigerisabelle 31
When I was little, I went to Texas to visit my cousins (I'm from San Francisco, California) and we went berry-picking on some dude's property... we didn't realize it was private, but we learned pretty quick after he fired a shotgun in the air. Mind you, I was eight, and I'd never heard a gun before. One of the most terrifying things ever.
Brandi_Faith 34
I bet you never went "ding dong ditching" again did you 4? Learnt your lesson pretty fast. And I bet 22 doesn't berry pick anymore either. lol. I live in Canada and it seems so weird and crazy that someone can just pull out a gun at someone cause they're on their own property! So weird. Does anyone else call "ding ding ditching" Nicky Nicky nine door?
dragonkisses28 25
#22...someone from Texas pulled a gun on you and DIDN't shoot you for trespassing? Y'all were some damn lucky kids.
CTPope74 13
.
hystericsky 11
I never went doorbell ditching but we got a lot of it in my old house and boy did we have some fun with them. It started simple, just talking to their parents. Their parents did the whole "kids will be kids" speech. Next we had cameras and threatened to call the police. Didn't work. Then my dad chased them down the street screaming. Still got it. Lastly I sat hidden next to a window with my floor tom when I knew they were out and went at it banging the drum when they got close to the door. We never got doorbell ditched again.
soulreaper12296 28
Call the cops on them for trespassing.
CHUBBYninja 18
They are kids. I think telling the parents about it is the worst that should be done.
JBChristian 47
And when kids commit a crime such as murder, should we also just go to the parents?
emilycardona7 18
thats unnecessary and creates extra drama
LittleBastard 20
What happened to not calling the police on some kids ding dong ditching? Its ******* stupid and a waste of the resonding officers time, mind you, it hapened to me a while ago. But calling the police on them while they enter the house is acceptable.
RastaZebra 8
#14 Someday a kid is going to try to murder you, and the cops will be across town arresting another kid for ringing a doorbell. You will have to take drastic action instead of the police just arresting the kid. Good luck in court, that is if you survive.
Sigilwen 24
I'd call the police if they came in my home, not if they just rang the door bell though. Telling their parents may not do any thing, sadly most parents refuse to correct their kids or think they have to be defensive.
soulreaper12296 28
#47, I'm talking about calling the cops on them for entering his home without permission.
junkman6 22
What happened to flaming bags of poop or hair gel on the door handle? Just barging on in? "Kids these days" just got no respect!
joeyaesy 8
haha my friends and i did that once ?
cryptic26 12
I'm Ron Burgundy ?
JH159753 21
"Escort" them out. That's trespassing, and they have no right to come in. Just guide them out of the front door, and invest in some locks.
sweetest_jenn 18
Escort? Please, I would've jumped out from behind a door and do my best Shrek growl at them while holding a baseball bat or something equally shit-inducing. That'll teach those turdlings.
koda2 6
Oops wrong click
WoldowJR 25
You and 62 others
WoldowJR 25
*211
fsomelife 26
That's where you non-chalantly, as if you don't even know they're there, freak them out with something out of a scary movie.
ChristianH39 30
Just grab the biggest kitchen knife you have and slowly turn towards them. That'll send them running
fsomelife 26
That can be misconstrued as an attack if things get out of hand. I was thinking more along the lines of dark rooms, weird music or creepy noises, scary mask, odd clothing, doing some weird ritual-looking thing over a table.
Respect101 17
Yeah 35, I'm sure OP has time to run down to the local party store to pick up some ritual ingredients. Elf blood, Troll teeth, ghost tears. All sold at your local store(:
thesmeagol 22
Wait you guys don't have your house decked out in Halloween stuff year round?
Neesalun 20
That happened at Halloween one year. Brats tried to get in the door. I was home alone and wasn't giving out candy. I never had my lights on or anything that suggested I was home.
gracehi 33
You deserve it for 1) Not having candy on Halloween and 2) Answering the door when you didn't have candy on Halloween.
amberv61 22
#30, I don't think you read them properly. They made everything seem like no one was home so obviously they didn't answer the door. The kids tried to break in. Plus not everyone has to spend their money to give candy away to kids that are gonna break in to your home