Today, my 2 year-old son decided to pee on the dog for the second day in a row. I'm afraid this will turn into a routine thing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I realized that my 3 year-old son, who is being potty trained, has better aim standing up to pee than his 30 year-old father. FML
Today, I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML
Today, I was with my 3 year-old son in the doctor's office. During the exam, he informed the doctor that he doesn't sleep in mommy's bed anymore because mommy sleeps in her underwear and farts all night long. FML
Today, I took the dog for a 45 minute walk/jog. She sniffed everything on the ground like she always does. She marked her territory twice, then we finally got home. As soon as I took her off the leash inside, she ran to the kitchen and took a dump right on the kitchen mat. FML
Today, I got a new babysitting job. Every time the little girl goes to the bathroom, she screams and cries until I wipe her. She's 7 years old. FML
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, my 5-year-old son made a drawing of our living room, with the addition of an apparition, and the text, "I can see you. Daddy doesn't see you. Who are you?" FML
Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML
Today, I found out that my neighbor's son is supposed to be giving me gas money for driving him to school each morning. He's using it to buy drugs instead. FML
Today, I've been babysitting a 4 month-old for two days. This has made a great impression on my cat, because now I can't sit down without him jumping up and licking my face until I pat his butt and rock him like the baby. FML
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Top comments
BoredomKillsinc 0
i hope the dog learns to defend itself and bite off the kids little weiner...
omgshaylaaa 0
awe it's your job to train your kid haha poor dog :(
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Comments (114)
redbeezy 0
what are you teaching him or the lack of
Lacrosse00 0
This is just your kids way of demonstrating and marking his territory. That dog is his. End of story! lol
Stupidpeopleanno 5
Let the dog handle this. The dog will show your kid who's boss when he bites his peniss off. Afterwards, your child will never aim at the dog again.
Filur 0
Come on. You're the boss. It doesn't become a routine thing unless you let it become one.
Seethatguy 3
Your kid is showing the dog that he is the Alpha Male. Pee on your kid. You'll be showing him that you're the Alpha Female and he is your territory; he has to live by your rules. If he refuses... tell him to piss off. Get it? Piss off? See what I did there?
sublime2craig 0
At least he's some what potty trained.
aims14 0
I know people that used to learn over the side of their deck and pee on whatever was below: pets, plants, a car, a bike, even people! And they did that until they were seven or eight.
LiL_MiSS_LYMARiZ 5
WIN .
Erikacd89 0
Just roll up a news paper and hit his noae while shoving his face in it..... He'll learn
nomnom_muffins 0
I totally agree with 83. However, 31, in the case that your child is autistic, there is not much to do there. But I am assuming the OP's kid is not, as it was never implied. Like many others so far have said, a simple swat on the bum should do the trick. Unless you are not a consistent parent, then it doesn't mean much. I've never had a kid though so what do I know, right?