Today, my 2 year-old son decided to pee on the dog for the second day in a row. I'm afraid this will turn into a routine thing. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized that my 3 year-old son, who is being potty trained, has better aim standing up to pee than his 30 year-old father. FML
Today, I cleaned my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML
Today, I was with my 3 year-old son in the doctor's office. During the exam, he informed the doctor that he doesn't sleep in mommy's bed anymore because mommy sleeps in her underwear and farts all night long. FML
Today, I took the dog for a 45 minute walk/jog. She sniffed everything on the ground like she always does. She marked her territory twice, then we finally got home. As soon as I took her off the leash inside, she ran to the kitchen and took a dump right on the kitchen mat. FML
Today, I got a new babysitting job. Every time the little girl goes to the bathroom, she screams and cries until I wipe her. She's 7 years old. FML
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, my 5-year-old son made a drawing of our living room, with the addition of an apparition, and the text, "I can see you. Daddy doesn't see you. Who are you?" FML
Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML
Today, I found out that my neighbor's son is supposed to be giving me gas money for driving him to school each morning. He's using it to buy drugs instead. FML
Today, I've been babysitting a 4 month-old for two days. This has made a great impression on my cat, because now I can't sit down without him jumping up and licking my face until I pat his butt and rock him like the baby. FML
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Top comments
BoredomKillsinc 0
i hope the dog learns to defend itself and bite off the kids little weiner...
omgshaylaaa 0
awe it's your job to train your kid haha poor dog :(
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Comments (114)
Falloner 0
as long as it's routine it will be easier to get used to
lideke 1
lol, that's kinda true
iSitt 0
what would da dog whisperer say about this?
bamagrl410 31
Hahahahaha that's hilarious. if you know he's going to do it, just keep him away from the dog?
kellanlvr 1
F the dog's life! atleast you're not the one getting peed on OP
derpherp 0
If only we had a picture D8
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
I say let him do his thing! it's about time someone stood up to these blasted dogs who go around peeing on all are stuff, thinking everything is a toilet to them. mans best friend indeed!
TheRealFamilyGuy 5
our* ffs -_-
omgshaylaaa 0
awe it's your job to train your kid haha poor dog :(
MrBoredGuy 1
or put diapers back on him
CitrusGirl 0
Or punish him.
TheDrifter 24
Either spray him with the squirt gun or swat him with the rolled up newspaper. What? It worked on the dog didn't it? The kid I a human, he should catch on even faster.
Roadkill007 9
lol but drifter.. some kids love getting squirted by squirt guns >.> so... you might be encouraging that type of behavior
lulzaroonie 0
keep the dog away from him until he's done his morning pee
BoredomKillsinc 0
i hope the dog learns to defend itself and bite off the kids little weiner...
squirell_AIDS69 0
That has got to be one of the weirdest things I've heard in a while.
evybeth 0
start potty training.
justication 2
I'm afraid that your son's penis may just get bitten off.
hairdreser0nfire 0
Time to potty train.
spanelli 16
Exactly. He should know by now that peeing on dogs is just... Well, not good?
Zmeilerr 22
Spanelli, I'm inclined to disagree with you. They're at that age where they're just starting to experiment with things and get into stuff they're not supposed to. While I agree the child doesn't know any better, the parent should still be telling him/her that it is wrong.
spanelli 16
Mm, very true. I suppose most of the children I know are raised by stricter parenting. By age two, they know better than to take a piss on a dog. I wonder if the dog tried to drink it...
chelle_starlight 0
nice...he was just marking his territory...
Doortje 30
You should keep an eye on that. Dog fetishes aren't pretty :(