Today, while out hiking, my phone slipped out of my pocket. I caught it and gave it to my little cousin, giving her a "special mission" to keep it safe. When we got back to our cars later, I asked her for my phone back. Turns out she left it under a shrub back in the hills so it'd be "safe." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my phone died. I plugged it in to charge and then went out to run some errands. When I returned, my phone was no where to be found, and our shovel was on the floor, muddy and wet. I then discovered my 6-year old son had buried my "dead" 200$ palmpilot because he had felt sorry for me. FML
Today, while on vacation with my family, my mother told me to put my phone in her purse, so it wouldn't get stolen. Someone stole her purse. FML
On the fritz
Today, I handed my friend his phone, telling him he'd forgotten it. He responded by taking his phone out of his pocket and showing it to me. I then realized I was holding MY phone. FML
Memory man
Today, my dad let me use his phone. Five minutes later, he had my mom call it because he thought he'd lost it. FML
Brainrot
Today, I accidentally left my cell phone at the restaurant. When I realized my mistake, I went back to see if anyone had found it. They said no, so I gave them my number to call if it turned up. I realized later that I'd given them my cell phone number. FML
What are the chances?
Today, I forgot my phone on the roof of my car. I took a 30 minute drive from my friend's city to my city. I got on to my driveway, surprised to see my phone still there. Thinking I'm really lucky, I pick up my phone. Then, I trip over a pebble, cracking my phone in the process. FML
Eye bleach
Today, I handed my mother-in-law my phone to see the toy that I was going to get for my nephew. While she had the phone, it swiped away to my last search of… vibrators and sex toys. I have no idea if she saw it before she handed me my phone back, saying, "It went away." FML
Scavengers
Today, I couldn't find my phone. Worried that I'd accidentally thrown it in the trash, I emptied out all the bins and searched the garbage. An hour later, my daughter said she'd found it by the bathroom sink. FML
Today, I went surfing, got a few rides, then realized I had my phone in my pocket. FML
Today, the snowblower found my lost phone. FML
Top comments
pjmommy 9
why would u give it to your LITTLE cousin?
Olivxr 5
well she did what you told her to, no complaints about that
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Comments (120)
waterkins 7
Next time bring a fanny pack
mofoitsthepopo 6
I don't know about you, but Mine is usually filled with spaghetti.
poccocurantes 7
Useful and stylish.
laya_fml 26
How bizarre. My fanny pack is usually filled with fans.
heliraptor 13
Or a bra. That's where my phone usually is.
waterkins 7
That's just a terrible idea, it'd probably fall down her shirt!
Sir_Loin257 4
Not sure OP wants to wear a bra... That might be a little strange considering he's a guy.
RedPillSucks 33
Need a place to keep those moobs...
CyborgBanana 12
42 - One word my friend: Moobs.
Axipiter 24
Yes, 37, next time OP definitely should bring a bra. That wouldn't be strange at all...
heliraptor 13
42 & 45, I didn't even notice. But come on, bras are so ******* convenient, it's like having a purse attached to your ****. You literally can't lose it.. Under most circumstances. And even if he didn't have the moobies to put in it, it's just all the more room to put other things.
Axipiter 24
Maybe if he needs some support for his massive ba-I'm not even going to finish that thought. I'm sorry folks.
heliraptor 13
Under the butt nut hut! They do make stash boxers though, which I suppose would be a more feasible option for him.
perdix 31
Bloody hell! Me and me mates at the pub were drinking our pints and nearly honked up our shepherd's pie when we saw this. What kind of bloke wears a ****** pack?!?!?! Blimey!
Catkam623 27
Perdix your comments are hit or miss but hit or miss they always make me laugh.
perdix 31
#56. I guess when I hit, you laugh WITH me; and when I miss, you laugh AT me. Hey, I'm not proud, I'll take both. Thanks!
LiterOfCola 16
Hey it's pretty weird; I usually love the comments perdix makes when he gets buried.
happle 21
I agree with 85, it's pretty nasty. Plus, I don't know where those bills have been, not to mention my phone isn't the cleanest thing in the world. I don't want to have who-knows-what rubbed off all over my bra or boobs.
Sputnikspak 13
This, and the fact that I loathe carrying a purse, is the reason why I started buying men's pants. Because they have actual pockets. That you can fit things in. Like your wallet and keys and cellphone. A purse is also a real pain in the ass when you use crutches to get around (which I do, disabled, yay). I worked in retail for a long time (over ten years) and it is TOTALLY nasty to pull money out of your bra. I could understand tucking a couple bucks under the strap at your shoulder for an emergency or something, but actually IN the part of your bra where your **** go? That is one of the sweatiest areas on the female body. Might as well stash it in your armpit.
AnimeCookie 9
Mine is filled with gravy.
Proughboy 7
I don't even get why you ever get thumbed down. Everyone of your comments always makes me laugh!
codyjohn17 5
The fanny pack will hold your stuff and bring all of the girls to the yard...
BlackRoseAndMe11 11
*proceeds to song "My Fanny Pack" by "Smosh"
Olivxr 5
well she did what you told her to, no complaints about that
zero91 4
haha yea .. op should have given the mission as deliver the phone safely to the car
Osito2011 9
His cousin was probably like, special mission my ass. Hold your own stuff cuzo!
pjmommy 9
why would u give it to your LITTLE cousin?
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Because the BIG cousin would have eaten it.
sniken 14
Some kids would've guarded his phone with their life. All depends on the kid!
ninjapiratejesus_fml 20
Small children + important valuables = recipe for disaster. Though I do admit that some of my little cousins are doing remarkably advanced stuff on their iPods for their ages. It really depends on how old the kid was.
jewwybeanzzz 10
my little sister would have done an excellent job taking care of my phone. I've entrusted her with my expensive camera and such before. If anyone tried to take it she would put up one hell of a good fight
Faff 20
I dont think it depends on how old the kid is, but more on her personality. But despite that, giving your phone to your little cousin for safekeeping is just really dumb.
TheOnlyMizLiv 22
Why would it EVEN occur to you to give it to your "little cousin". I mean, how old is she to have an idea like that?
TheOnlyMizLiv 22
Ugh, that's supposed to be a question mark. I edited it but it didn't register.
ttqq 7
She must be really young if she leaves a phone under a shrub
JustLikeTheStars 10
Pfft if I lost my phone I would not get another. I would have to pay for my new one and pay it monthly
KirstenZ 6
Haha. Special mission turns out to be really special and memorable.
theballetdancer 5
Hey I agree. It could be one of those stories everyone laughs about in time. Maybe.
capslockisgood 19
Too bad it isn't funny though.
kumonsucks 7
Put it in your back pack? Or deeper pocket?
lilhellian 27
Just more exercise!:D
Welshite 40
Huh, that's actually pretty good for a safe place. I usually stow my phone under a rock in a stream.
poccocurantes 7
Bunnies feel safe in the shrubs.
lmaouloser 5
12- the water could cause a problem too! D:
onorexveritas 24
no way! I do too!
capslockisgood 19
63 - Are you kidding me?
laya_fml 26
Was it a black berry shrub?
howdeedoo 22
Or poison oak?
nchov523 11
I don't believe you understood the pun.
rockstar362 8
Was it under an apple tree?
laya_fml 26
That's a good possibility. Should iPhone the OP and ask?
rockstar362 8
Only if you have the minutes, if not maybe try face to Facetime
BunchieRules 31
9 - I HTC what you did there! OP, if your sister wanted the phone to be safe, she should have kept it in her palm.
BunchieRules 31
9 - I HTC what you did there! OP, if your sister wanted the phone to be safe, she should have kept it in her palm.
BananerzFresh 12
Time for another hike.