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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I called the company with whom I had a job interview last week, which I thought went great, but hadn't heard back from. One of the interviewers claimed that I tried to grope her. FML

#5201164
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30457) - you deserved it (2608)

On 09/12/2009 at 2:32am - work - by badjob - United States (Oregon)

Today, I filled out an application at WalMart after being unable to find a job in three months. I just graduated from law school. With honors. FML

#5193582
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48116) - you deserved it (4512)

On 09/11/2009 at 8:10pm - work - by Thistle (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, after picking up my 6 year old from school, he says, "Drew said his dad could beat you up." I told him that he needs to respect his own father more and stand up for me! I get home, look up his class roster and low and behold, Drew's dad beat me up in Jr. High. FML

#5189179
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29326) - you deserved it (17973)

On 09/11/2009 at 4:11pm - work - by jeph23 (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my friends took me out to the most expensive restaurant in town to celebrate my promotion, we ordered everything with expensive drinks too. They 'took a smoke break' and left me with the bill. FML

#5184573
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35702) - you deserved it (4213)

On 09/11/2009 at 7:57am - work - by howrude (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was leaving my job at a huge mall. I couldn't find my car anywhere, so I panicked and flagged a security officer. I cried while he drove me around for miles in the endless parking lot. Then, suddenly, I remembered. My friend had dropped me off in the morning. FML

#5166474
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8403) - you deserved it (49960)

On 09/10/2009 at 10:15am - work - by ritz (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got stuck in an elevator for 45 minutes. I am an elevator mechanic. FML

#5163293
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36744) - you deserved it (6210)

On 09/10/2009 at 2:02am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, at work, I was on my break when I had to use the bathroom. I was on the toilet taking a dump when the door latch loosened and the door swung open. The little girl standing there took one look and screamed. Security busted in. My pants were still down. FML

#5154574
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32112) - you deserved it (2357)

On 09/09/2009 at 7:30pm - work - by slashteddy (woman) - United States

Today, my boss fired me because a coworker had seen me reading magazines on the job. That same coworker was the one who offered me the magazine. FML

#5129906
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37341) - you deserved it (6949)

On 09/08/2009 at 4:48pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I got to work feeling slightly unwell. A couple of hours later, an extremely attractive customer came to my till, at which point my body decided it would be a good idea to vomit last night's dinner all over myself and the customer. FML

#5122980
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35133) - you deserved it (3979)

On 09/08/2009 at 5:07am - work - by h0308 (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, at work, I accidentally got ink on my white dress shirt - right by my left nipple. Absentmindedly, I licked my finger and tried rubbing the stain out. When I looked up, the Vice President was staring at me in disbelief. FML

#5110537
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34297) - you deserved it (5920)

On 09/07/2009 at 6:19pm - work - by CMANIA (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that I was denied for work study eligibility by my college. I went to my financial advisor to ask why. It wasn't my grades or attendance. Apparently my father makes too much money for me to get a job at the school. My dad was fired 3 months ago and has been out of work since. FML

#5096534
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37475) - you deserved it (2107)

On 09/07/2009 at 1:04am - work - by SapphireRaven (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was fired from my catering job for pointing out the unsafe food conditions. I'm studying food safety in college. FML

#5079385
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33914) - you deserved it (5487)

On 09/06/2009 at 10:21am - work - by boohoo (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, while I was at the beach I decided to go into the ocean even though the waves looked rough. While I was in the water, I got caught by the riptide and needed to be saved. The reason I was at the beach? I'm a lifeguard. Now all my co-workers won't stop laughing at me. FML

#5055493
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25879) - you deserved it (16016)

On 09/05/2009 at 3:22am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)



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