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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, I went over to this girl's house that I really like. I was planning on cooking her dinner. In the process, the grease in the pan got too hot and caught fire. We ended up having to call the fire department. FML

#13340119
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24388) - you deserved it (8044)

On 10/06/2010 at 5:31am - love - by fireman (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out I was pregnant. I told my boyfriend, who held me and promised it'd be all right, and he'd never leave me. One sandwich later, he'd forgotten about the whole thing, and dumped me when I reminded him. FML

#13339681
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40114) - you deserved it (5763)

On 10/06/2010 at 3:21am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I received a friend request on Facebook. I didn't know her, but she was cute, so I accepted the request. After looking at her pictures, I sent her a message saying "What's up cutie, do I know you?". She responded "Yes, I'm your cousin". FML

#13338032
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12386) - you deserved it (55131)

On 10/06/2010 at 12:37am - love - by crucets (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I told the girl I've been seeing for a while about the strong feelings that I have for her and that I was falling in love. She told me my words made her realize what it felt like to be in love. My words were so powerful, in fact, that she ran right back into the arms of her ex boyfriend. FML

#13331586
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38496) - you deserved it (3545)

On 10/05/2010 at 5:27pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend grabbed my love handles. It tickled, so I giggled and squirmed out of his grip. He looked at me quizzically and said, "I'm surprised you still have feeling there with all that fat." FML

#13324993
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35971) - you deserved it (8550)

On 10/05/2010 at 12:47am - love - by June - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went jet skiing with my girlfriend of four years. I intended to propose to her. The $2000 ring fell out of my pocket and into the lake. I have no idea where it is. FML

#13317207
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24631) - you deserved it (50982)

On 10/04/2010 at 2:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband and I moved to get closer to his job. Today he got transferred 150 miles away from where we moved to. FML

#13297410
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28867) - you deserved it (2479)

On 10/03/2010 at 12:00am - love - by liz - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend wanted to prove how honest he is so he showed me numerous texts in his phone where he told other women he was in a relationship before asking them to sleep with him. FML

#13293908
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33659) - you deserved it (3203)

On 10/02/2010 at 8:12pm - love - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend called me over for dinner. When I walked in the door, he asked why I was here; apparently he dialed the wrong girlfriend. FML

#13287186
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39908) - you deserved it (3003)

On 10/02/2010 at 9:04am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I married the woman I love. I wasn't the groom, I was the minister. FML

#13285940
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68315) - you deserved it (6459)

On 10/02/2010 at 4:07am - love - by Pr unlucky - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because 'I look like his hamster when I'm eating sunflower seeds.' FML

#13285229
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31851) - you deserved it (5658)

On 10/02/2010 at 2:28am - love - by ohman - Singapore

Today, my girlfriend informed me that she is still in love with the guy she cheated on me with. She admitted that she would be willing to do anything with him if he wanted to. And, "He's a better kisser too." FML

#13283884
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34216) - you deserved it (5028)

On 10/02/2010 at 12:22am - love - by laterchoice (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, the girl who I was in love with for almost seven years listed me on facebook as her "Brother." FML

#13281816
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36246) - you deserved it (6185)

On 10/01/2010 at 10:11pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Israel (Tel Aviv)



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