Today, I was on hold with the cable company for an hour. When I finally got someone, I walked into the kitchen to where it was quiet and slid across the floor, falling on my butt and losing my connection on the phone. My 2-year-old son had sprayed the floor with nonstick cooking spray. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37518) - you deserved it (4965)
On 04/18/2013 at 7:26am - kids - by cowgirl927 - United States
Today, I woke up to my brother chopping all my bangs off. When I yelled at him, he could only shout back, "You can see clearly now, the bangs are gone!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43840) - you deserved it (7041)
On 04/17/2013 at 12:13pm - kids - by my dumb bro - United States (Arkansas)
Today, I left my son with my husband while I went to the store. Ten minutes later, my dog was missing a large patch of fur, and neither of them can stop laughing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33503) - you deserved it (6498)
On 04/17/2013 at 11:14am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my husband told me that he thinks I am getting a little heavy and may need to lay off the junk food. The ultrasound is hanging on our fridge. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48858) - you deserved it (4439)
On 04/15/2013 at 9:35pm - kids - by Mimi (woman) - United States (California)
Today, after an exhausting weekend of work, I decided to take a nap. I was awoken several hours later by my mother-in-law knocking on my door. Apparently my 11-year-old called up grandma to complain that she was hungry and that mum was sleeping instead of cooking dinner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35916) - you deserved it (13507)
On 04/14/2013 at 5:58am - kids - by jasminejzhu (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was supervising some kids, who were playing on a bouncy castle. One of them managed to kick me in the face during a jump, and looking for an apology, I asked, "What do you say?" He paused, then shouted, "HEADSHOTTTTT!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (37379) - you deserved it (16747) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 04/12/2013 at 8:14pm - kids - by xx-look-at-xx - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)
Today, as I walked out of the local store, I noticed a young girl was sitting on the curb, crying. I nudged her with the Snickers bar I had bought earlier, thinking she needed it more than me. After looking at it, she yelled, "PEDOPHILE!", punched me in the balls, and then ran away screaming. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38119) - you deserved it (8654)
On 04/10/2013 at 8:45pm - kids - by Me - United States (California)
Today, I came home from work to find my son and his friends attempting to find out how many of them could fit into one of my pairs of pants. So far, five. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34363) - you deserved it (16692)
On 04/10/2013 at 9:26am - kids - by fatmom (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)
Today, I found out that my daughter has been stuffing my push-up bras and lipstick into her backpack, putting them on at school, and taking them off before she gets home. She's 9. The only reason I found out is because her teacher reported me to social services. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42986) - you deserved it (3484)
On 04/09/2013 at 4:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my doctor asked me how often I drink, and I responded, "Socially." My three-year-old piped up, "No Mom, you drink all the time." My doctor now thinks I'm a raging alcoholic. My kid has never seen me drink. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30054) - you deserved it (2163)
On 04/09/2013 at 6:30am - kids - by AAMBC4 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my 16-year-old son convinced my 14-year-old daughter that she wasn't allowed to use the ladies bathroom at the shopping centre, because she wasn't wearing a dress like the girl on the sign. He told her girls in pants always used the other one. She believed him. This is my legacy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34899) - you deserved it (4504)
On 04/08/2013 at 12:26am - kids - by badparent (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, at the store, I noticed a girl eyeing a chocolate bunny. Her mom refused to buy it, saying they didn't have enough money. She started crying, so I decided to make her day and offered to buy it for her. Her mom reacted by slapping me across the face and calling me a "pedo." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39101) - you deserved it (6985)
On 04/05/2013 at 8:13pm - kids - by easteryegg (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my twelve year-old son thought it would be a good idea to relentlessly shoot the mail truck with a paintball gun in front of all the neighbors. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25350) - you deserved it (8091)
On 04/05/2013 at 12:25am - kids - by NYmets456 - United States (New York)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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