Tonight, on First Dates…

By dumper - 05/11/2009 06:41 - United States

Today, I finally got the courage to go on a first date with this guy I had a crush on for months. It was such a big deal for me cause it was my first date ever. The first thing he says when we met was, "I have to take a dump." I sat by myself for 10 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 221
You deserved it 5 589
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Top comments

teiso_fml 0

Since it's your first date ever, here's something you should know about guys: Sometimes, they have to poo. Even when they're on a date. It's not their fault, it's just the way their bodies work.

48 6
SaintJimmy 0

You do not want. Trust me I know these kinds of people.

31 3

Comments

ultraslick 0

YDI, you chose this guy.

0 1
perdix 29

You should have offered him a blumpkin. That may me rushing things for your first date ever, but you would have an amusing story to tell the family every Thanksgiving. "Well, kids, when I first went out with your grandpa, he said he needed to take a shit, and I said, 'Why don't we make it a blumpkin?' and we got married the next day." And you'll laugh and laugh!

0 0
jonny2x4 0

You are the dread pirate plexico, admit it.

0 0
Amphysvena 11

You had to wait ten whole minutes? Holy ****, how did you not kill yourself?

0 0
polico_wolf 0

*gasp* he should be hanged! I mean, come on! he goes to the toilet! How could you possibly date somebody who goes to do a poo?! your life is ruined. but seriously, he said "dump" and not "shit" you have to give him some credit for that

0 0
anonymous69_fml 0

ahhh, a girl finally realizes that love isn't all frills and cupids everywhere...I like these kinds of moments

1 0
Njtorres 0

if you dont like how we guys act then turn lesbo deal with it....

0 0
MamaC_fml 0

I'm not sure - lesbians poop too, and she might not able to handle that.

0 0
artandis 0

ugh see I dont think its a big deal he had to go to the washroom first off its that he said it like 'i have to go take a dump' and it was the first thing out of his mouth. if u have to go then fine, but really? you cant say hi first or jsut say your going to the washroom like a normal person?

0 0
Nakedsquirrel 5

CMON OBAMA MAKE IT ILLEGAL FOR PEOPLE TO POOP IF I HAPPEN TO LIKE THEM This could've been avoided if only the government did their job!

0 0
Nakedsquirrel 5

Brilliant deduction. I'll bet you didn't even need the magnifying glass.

0 0
PhillyFox 0

Kinda classless, but not necessarily a loser.

0 0
Pez_on_a_stick 0

Are you all high or something? She's not bothered he had to go crap, she's bothered that it's the first thing he said to her and was so blunt about it.

2 0
lydiakj 1

Thank you! I don't get why everyone is misunderstanding OP's point. It's just so awkward that this is how he started off the date. If she has liked him for a long time, she probably had an idealized version of him and he totally broke the image by starting the date with the least romantic thing available. I'm sure that image would have broken eventually...but immediately? Sad for her.

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