It's not undermining her rights because it's not like he's going to marry her even if she doesn't want to get married. He's simply making sure her parents are okay with the marriage. If he wants to become a part if the family, which remember is a huge aspect of getting married, he should know that they don't resent their marriage. He never disrespected her decision in anyway, he just want to make sure her father doesn't hate him. And if he values her father's opinion, than he obviously cares about her a lot.

Why the **** would her father need to grow up? He recognizes his daughter as a person and also sees that tradition for what it is: outdated and sexist. Sounds like YOU need to grow up.

How is it sexist to see how the in laws feel? It's not an either-or proposition. In this day and age, "permission" is not a word to be taken literally. The in laws are people the husband is gonna want to be on good terms with going forward. Grow up.

Anyhow, by denying "permission", isn't the dad contradicting his own (twisted) view?

asking permission to marry his daughter is rude and disrespectful to his girlfriend. it makes it appear as if the boy still views her as property instead of an actual person. I am a female and a person. as such, I would love if the guy proposed to ME FIRST then TOGETHER we went to my father and asked for his BLESSING, not his PERMISSION. that way it is more of "we're getting married and we want you to be okay with it. so we're giving you and us a chance to work out any problems we have now so it won't be problematic in the future". instead of it being like "I want your daughter for my own so I am asking you to give her to me, despite how she feels".

I feel like people are taking the word "permission" too literally. It's not like he's going to marry her regardless of her decision. Asking for a blessing is not "sexist", he did it to be on good terms with her father which I personally think, as a woman myself, a good thing to do because you need to remember your in laws are a big part of being married. You wouldn't want your parents to resent your marriage, now would you? He's not going to marry her is she doesn't want to get married, obviously, I feel like some people are thinking he's outdated just because he used the word "permission". Calm down guys, this isn't a sexist issei you're making out to be one.

this is the most stupid post I have ever seen. I would respect my father more than I do now (if that's possible) if a man asked for his permission and replied with this. cause he's right. if the guy did respect me as a person than he should know that it isnt up to my father. its my decision to say yes. we should be asking for his blessing together after the proposal has happened. permisson makes it sound like Im property to be transferred. but when we both ask for my father and mother's blessing then Im basically telling my parent's that I am getting married so if they have any unressolved issues with us being together then we all have time to work through it so we can be a happy couple. I would even go to his parents with him and ask for their blessing so there isnt any hard feelings any where that will come out during later years.

#71: If it was supposed to be an act of respect towards people who made and raised her, why didn't he ask both her parents? Why just her father? Doesn't her mother get a vote in the whole permission thing?

...what?

Marraige is the #1 reason for divorce worldwide!