Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Man or woman?

Today, my boyfriend compared my boobs to a flat tire. FML

#12715856
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35542) - you deserved it (6959)

On 08/24/2010 at 3:29am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I realized that I hadn't seen my video camera in a while. After searching for several minutes in my room, I remembered that I had given it to my dad to hide before our month long trip (so even if someone broke into the house the video camera would be safe). He's forgotten where he hid it. FML

#12715799
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23842) - you deserved it (8899)

On 08/24/2010 at 3:25am - misc - by lostvideo - Israel (Yerushalayim)

Today, I was at my sixteenth birthday party. My guests consisted of my grandma who I live with, and my 2-year-old cousin she was babysitting. FML

#12715752
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35933) - you deserved it (4058)

On 08/24/2010 at 3:18am - misc - by bestbirthdayever - United States (California)

Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML

#12714961
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32786) - you deserved it (10754)

On 08/24/2010 at 2:17am - intimacy - by chewybarseventy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was working at my job as a cashier, checking out an elderly woman's groceries. She was very nice, and we chatted for a couple minutes. Once she had paid, she leaned close to me and said, very politely, "I'm so so sorry that I mistook you for a girl at first, young man." I AM a girl. FML

#12714579
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34242) - you deserved it (4733)

On 08/24/2010 at 1:52am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, while I was on a date, I noticed my ex-boyfriend in the restaurant, and he looked sad. So I walked over to see him and jokingly said, "You look like your mom died or something!" She had. FML

#12712941
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15897) - you deserved it (50218)

On 08/24/2010 at 12:21am - love - by perfectlybrokenx - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked out of the operating room at the end of an emergency case. I spent ten minutes talking to a woman about her son before we realized I was talking to the wrong family. FML

#12710116
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12326) - you deserved it (27336)

On 08/23/2010 at 10:17pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I discovered that my infertile girlfriend, who I have been having unprotected sex with for the past two months, is apparently very fertile. FML

#12706855
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19227) - you deserved it (51986)

On 08/23/2010 at 7:31pm - intimacy - by Ahook1 (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was driving home with my dad after buying a new truck. We were on the freeway and the engine wasn't revving up very much. My dad thought that something was wrong with my transmission, so he reached over to change gears. Most cars won't go into reverse at high speeds. Mine does. FML

#12706799
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29330) - you deserved it (2975)

On 08/23/2010 at 7:28pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I helped move my current boyfriend into his new dorm room. This would've been fine if I didn't have to do this while avoiding eye contact with my ex-boyfriend, who just happens to be my boyfriend's new roommate. FML

#12706497
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33416) - you deserved it (4534)

On 08/23/2010 at 7:09pm - love - by DormHater (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my daughter and I went to the carnival and had our faces painted. When we returned home hours later, I realized I have a deep sunburn all around my face except for the skin under the paint in the shape of a gecko. FML

#12706107
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27854) - you deserved it (10072)

On 08/23/2010 at 6:44pm - misc - by lizardface (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went on a double date with my bestfriend. At the end of the night, her boyfriend gave her a long kiss, and texted her 5 minutes after we left to say he missed her already. My boyfriend picked his nose, then gave me a fist bump as a goodbye. FML

#12698820
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37321) - you deserved it (6691)

On 08/23/2010 at 7:40am - love - by Sara1990 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out the "small termite problem" the inspector told me about wasn't so small when a box from the attic fell through the floor and hit me in the head. FML

#12697631
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29818) - you deserved it (3133)

On 08/23/2010 at 5:03am - health - by concusion - United States (Texas)



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