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Today, I was at work at a supermarket straightening shelves in the food aisles. Just as I had finished and got ready to clock out, I heard a giant crash. A lady in a motor scooter knocked over an entire aisle of canned goods. She got up and walked away just fine, pretending nothing happened. FML

MrConcise's comment : Ah, so she's "handicapped" and doesn't even need the scooter?

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Today, my boyfriend's brother and fiancé decided to preach to me about how I need to read the Bible because I'm agnostic. I'd be fine if it wasn't coming from two 19-year-olds who dated for 5 months, got pregnant, got engaged, lost the baby, and still wanna get married, "so they don't look bad." FML

#21438785
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24560) - you deserved it (1994)

On 07/08/2015 at 11:24pm - misc - by ZiggyTink - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my 5-year-old won't stop princess-waving at people. This would be fine, but she looks exactly like she is giving the Nazi salute. I got dirty looks from nearly everyone at the supermarket. FML

#21438778
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22532) - you deserved it (1922)

On 07/08/2015 at 11:13pm - kids - by momoftheyearedition - United States (Pennsylvania)

Cads1's comment : They grow up so fast. Waving one day, invading Poland the next.

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Today, instead of canceling for the third consecutive time due to work-related reasons, my boyfriend sent his twin brother on our date. They both thought I wouldn't notice. FML

#21438625
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26304) - you deserved it (1671)

On 07/08/2015 at 4:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

mikeman1744's comment : That's such a TV show thing to do haha

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Today, while at a party, I ran into the girl I've liked for ages. I was so nervous, but I managed to keep the conversation going for a half hour. After mustering up the courage to ask her out on a date, her drunk, over-protective ex burst in and threw up on my shirt. Good timing, asswipe. FML

#21438523
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23805) - you deserved it (1659)

On 07/08/2015 at 1:45pm - love - by welpwelpwelp - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, while visiting family in Taipei, I came across a large button that said "PUSH" on it. I was curious and pushed it. A deafening alarm then sounded for the next 10 minutes, attracting concerned neighbours and finally a security guard who informed me that I'd pushed a panic button. FML

#21438499
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22143) - you deserved it (9626)

On 07/08/2015 at 12:30pm - misc - by whoops (woman) - Taiwan

Today, I'm so out of shape that I got winded from getting out of bed. FML

#21438468
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17916) - you deserved it (15975)

On 07/08/2015 at 11:16am - health - by Jack Shart Jr. (man) - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend how my mom died when I was 11 after crashing her car into a tree at night. He muttered "Women drivers." FML

#21438456
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32783) - you deserved it (2682)

On 07/08/2015 at 10:44am - love - by freshly single (woman) - Aruba

Today, I guest-played as a catcher for a new fastpitch softball team. After the first couple of innings, the batter fouled a ball back into my catcher's mask. As a concussion test, the coach asked me what her name was. I decided to fake the concussion rather than admit that I'd forgotten her name. FML

#21438439
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23274) - you deserved it (5206)

On 07/08/2015 at 9:58am - health - by Softball - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, when I visited my daughter's apartment that she moved into about 3 months ago, I found out that she buys new underwear every time she runs out instead of washing her dirty ones. Her dirty ones have their own special hamper. FML

#21438428
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23137) - you deserved it (2402)

On 07/08/2015 at 9:29am - kids - by grossed out mom - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I attended a work interview. My hay fever has been flaring up during the hot weather, causing my throat to swell up and make me short of breath, which I explained. The woman interviewing me told me I was unsuccessful, as customers wouldn't be able to understand someone with my 'disability'. FML

#21438401
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22133) - you deserved it (1602)

On 07/08/2015 at 7:01am - work - by FuckPollen (woman) - United Kingdom (Hartlepool)

Today, while waiting the required 5 minutes for my hair removal cream to work, my cat rubbed all over my legs while I wasn't looking. After getting clawed to death throwing her in the bath to get the cream off, all her hair on that side fell off. I now have a half hairless cat. FML

#21438347
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22877) - you deserved it (3925)

On 07/08/2015 at 3:04am - animals - by coolcat10156 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my father lectured me for dating a man with "no future". even though he's entering a PhD program next year at a top university. Meanwhile, my dad's last relationship was with a 20-year-old hooker who ended up stealing his credit cards. FML

#21438331
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25927) - you deserved it (1462)

On 07/08/2015 at 2:17am - misc - by WayToGoDaddyHo (woman) - United States (Oregon)



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