Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I got a new haircut. I was feeling pretty confident, until coworkers and family members kept making comments like, "I think you gained a little weight", "You look older" and "Do you still like guys?" Apparently, my new haircut changed my waist size and my sexual orientation. FML

#21371884
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27514) - you deserved it (2626)

On 03/10/2015 at 2:47pm - misc - by Lovemynewhaircut (woman) - United States (California)

garrett_8614's comment : Who just asks someone "Do you still like guys?" That's pretty rude. FYL

See all the comments →

Today, after years of providing daily various home-made colourful meals for three kids and a husband, I was asked to "cook something cool, like instant hamburgers, not that lame healthy shit". FML

#21371880
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11) - you deserved it (3767)

On 03/10/2015 at 2:43pm - kids - by LameChef (man) - Poland

rylaii's comment : This is when husband and children learn to cook their own food

See all the comments →

Today, I lost a grade on an essay, because according to my teacher, I put much more detail into my analytical essay than I should have. FML

#21371844
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25) - you deserved it (2637)

On 03/10/2015 at 1:36pm - misc - by writerflaw - United States (Alaska)

annarcheer's comment : Honestly you need to talk to someone about that because you don't want to end up with a crappy grade because your teachers an idiot.

See all the comments →

Today, I went to get a physical, forgetting I'd shaved my pubes the day before and still had bad razor burn. My doctor told me I had "dicken pox" and was prescribing me with shaving cream. FML

#21371826
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27004) - you deserved it (6347)

On 03/10/2015 at 12:45pm - health - by parkoursam - United States (Illinois)

Today, the only birthday present I got was a gift card to a steak house. Not a bad gift, but I'm a vegan. FML

#21371753
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30462) - you deserved it (7236)

On 03/10/2015 at 9:27am - misc - by oh well - United States

Today, the principal of the school I teach at told me she's not interested in re-hiring me because sometimes I wear a hoodie. FML

#21371721
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9) - you deserved it (4577)

On 03/10/2015 at 7:28am - work - by schoolsucks - United States (Colorado)

Today, my ex-boyfriend asked me to homecoming, in front of the whole school, knowing I have social anxiety. I was forced to say yes to not seem like an asshole. Now I can't back out. FML

#21371675
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18) - you deserved it (5877)

On 03/10/2015 at 4:03am - love - by TooMuchAnxiety (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, I showed my father a nice sweatshirt online, hoping he would take the hint and get it for me. He did, three sizes larger than mine, for himself. FML

#21371647
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26641) - you deserved it (7154)

On 03/10/2015 at 2:19am - money - by SkottLong - United States (Utah)

Today, I overcame my lack of social confidence and got a date for the first time in 10 or so years. After a while, my date admitted that she's a schizophrenic with dissociative identity disorder. I guess it's back to being single. FML

#21371640
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26666) - you deserved it (6207)

On 03/10/2015 at 2:02am - love - by CrazyInLove - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mom demanded that I go into the basement and fix the water heater. I told her that I had no idea how to fix it, so she threw my phone down the stairs, told me to Google it, and locked the basement door behind me. It's been two hours. FML

#21371408
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23) - you deserved it (2393)

On 03/09/2015 at 8:28pm - misc - by MyMomIsInsane - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got to listen to my boss lecture me about professional dress and subtly insinuate that my being on the heavier side top-wise with all the men in the office could be a problem. I've worn turtle necks for the whole two months I've been working there. FML

#21371359
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26104) - you deserved it (1908)

On 03/09/2015 at 6:59pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I noticed that whenever I don't give the homeless guy around the corner some money, my side mirrors get stolen. FML

Today, an old friend of mine landed in Spain, where he's visiting me. After a few minutes talking about where we should meet, we realized the reason he couldn't figure out where it was, was probably due to the fact that he was in Barcelona. I live in Madrid. FML

#21371100
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31081) - you deserved it (4016)

On 03/09/2015 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Spain (Aragon)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • OK jkjk it was FMLS April Fools
  •   Yah its know over, ive stoppd wrotting… Sorry, I'll try again. There, it's over, I can stop typing TXT language with my forehead. Yes, you probably cottened on that it was our little…

Monday 30 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: