Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Today, I spent over $2,000 on a big flatscreen TV. My dad insisted I let him mount it on the wall instead of paying someone to do it. All seemed fine, until the TV came loose and smashed onto the floor. My dad refuses to accept responsibility, and says I should've had a professional install it instead. FML

#21293581
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39993) - you deserved it (6463)

On 11/06/2014 at 6:37pm - money - by Anonymou$ (woman) - United States (Alabama)

ZachColeA's comment : Well your dad's an ass

See all the comments →

Today, I threw out my back while trying to put together my new ergonomic chair, which was supposed to help my bad back. FML

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

#21293465
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33017) - you deserved it (6413)

On 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm - love - by notsofriendly (woman) - United States (Texas)

LaColombianita's comment : At least he doesn't let people say shit to you. That was nice of him to have your back.

See all the comments →

Today, I took a video of a fellow employee doing nothing but watching YouTube videos at work. When I showed the video to my boss, hoping he'd be reprimanded, I got fired for operating video equipment on company grounds. FML

#21293428
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26401) - you deserved it (33169)

On 11/06/2014 at 2:09pm - work - by NoJobNovember - United States (Ohio)

tehstarchild's comment : Ydi it for trying to get someone else in trouble

See all the comments →

Today, my mentally-unhinged mother reached a new level of psycho - she threw a tantrum and raged at my father, accusing him of cheating on her with our cat. FML

#21293397
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34845) - you deserved it (2457)

On 11/06/2014 at 1:30pm - misc - by CatLover (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend kept jiggling my fat rolls while we were cuddling. I was annoyed, and I told him he could at least go for my boobs instead. He instantly replied, "But these are bigger..." FML

#21293369
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34523) - you deserved it (7569)

On 11/06/2014 at 12:14pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my eight-year-old microwaved our thermometer to see if the temperature would change. FML

#21293257
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30956) - you deserved it (3550)

On 11/06/2014 at 7:15am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my boss told me to fire the unstable, former military, gun nut employee. He's been making death threats to his supervisors. FML

#21293180
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31670) - you deserved it (2468)

On 11/06/2014 at 1:53am - work - by HelpMe1 (man) - Indonesia (Jakarta Raya)

Today, for the first time since I can remember, I went in to work feeling positive, and that I could make good things happen. At the end of the day, my employment was terminated. FML

#21292980
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32766) - you deserved it (2651)

On 11/05/2014 at 9:03pm - work - by jobless (man) - United States (California)

Today, my dad told me that my mom wanted to name me something "unusual." He eventually got her to compromise. I go by Violet. I now know that my legal name is Purple. FML

#21292947
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36287) - you deserved it (2404)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:12pm - misc - by Purple (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend became a magician. His best trick? The disappearing act. FML

#21292946
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30137) - you deserved it (3352)

On 11/05/2014 at 8:11pm - love - by highheelcyanide (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out it is possible to get whiplash and a concussion from a tickle fight you have with your boyfriend. FML

#21292929
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26929) - you deserved it (3536)

On 11/05/2014 at 7:48pm - health - by cjhgvb - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I took a army-mandated personality evaluation test. The results said I had a high chance of schizophrenia and multiple personality syndrome. Part of me says that the test is probably spot-on, the other part says it has to be a mistake. Apparently this is another sign of schizophrenia. FML



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: