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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I'm mad at my dad for forgetting it's my birthday. He's mad at me for not reminding him. FML

#21514262
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19248) - you deserved it (1748)

On 01/12/2016 at 9:44am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, at work, a drunk demanded a salad dressing we don't have. He marched into my kitchen and demanded I make it for him. When I said we didn't have the ingredients, he pushed the microwave over and stormed out. My boss came in and wrote me up for being "pushy and rude to customers". FML

#21514245
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22887) - you deserved it (1278)

On 01/12/2016 at 8:24am - work - by Talis (man) - United States (California)

BDanzeisen's comment : Whoever said the customer is always right was a moron

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Today, after waking up to find a large spider outside my bedroom door and screaming, waking up my mum to kill it, she then sprayed it and went to pick it up. She then informed me it was made of plastic. My cat had got into the Halloween decorations from the spare room and decided to play. FML

#21514228
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16880) - you deserved it (5018)

On 01/12/2016 at 5:48am - animals - by mutantprincess - Australia

TheLadyOpal's comment : You're in Australia, you're excused.

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Today, my anxiety was escalating so I decided to try an anti-anxiety adult coloring book to calm myself down. Too bad I got more stressed out about which colors l should use. FML

Today, I finished reading a manga series on a website I go on all the time. As I read the last page I got a huge celebratory message from the website saying I was the first one to read every manga on their site. The website opened in 2011 and has over 30,000 manga. My God, I need a social life. FML

#21514123
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21475) - you deserved it (6174)

On 01/11/2016 at 9:47pm - misc - by Lesser spotted female gaming nerd (woman) - United States (Virginia)

lemothelemon's comment : That's... Sad. But strangely inspiring? There's a hell of a lot of manga I won't read so good on you...? God even manwha?! Some of those are terrible!

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Today, while I was in a very important meeting on Skype, my apartment complex was evacuated due to the fire alarm going off. The reason was that my neighbor put a fork in his microwave due to him being extremely drunk. FML

#21514057
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19019) - you deserved it (1207)

On 01/11/2016 at 6:15pm - work - by DookDaSpook (man) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to my roommate's friend rustling in the attic without permission to be there. When I asked how he got in with all doors and windows locked, he simply said, "It's a secret." FML

#21514032
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18516) - you deserved it (1300)

On 01/11/2016 at 4:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. Whilst browsing the web, I clicked on an ad that said "How to Get Your Ex Back in a Day". Now I am single and have a computer virus. FML

#21514013
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16052) - you deserved it (20146)

On 01/11/2016 at 4:04pm - love - by lonely - United States (Idaho)

 Today, I realized how lonely I am, when I got a call from an elderly women who had dialed the wrong number. We ended up having a 20 minute conversation about her cat and how he "just won't use the darn litter pan." I was sad when she had to hang up. FML

#21513970
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22387) - you deserved it (2187)

On 01/11/2016 at 1:03pm - misc - by JoseIsAdork (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that my crush of a few years likes me. How? Her boyfriend told me, followed by a punch in the face. FML

#21513961
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22830) - you deserved it (1658)

On 01/11/2016 at 12:21pm - love - by anon (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my roommate invited a couple of homeless gentlemen in to our house. After drinking all our beer, throwing up on our carpet, and repeatedly asking if we were planning on killing them, I asked them to leave. My roommate told them they're welcome back anytime. FML

#21513863
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22133) - you deserved it (1870)

On 01/11/2016 at 4:12am - misc - by heart of cold - United States

Today, I was out with my brother and his group of very cute friends at a Cheesecake Factory. When the server came to take our orders, she asked me what kind of sauce I liked. Like a complete fuckwit, I blurted, "I like creamy white stuff." The guy across from me choked on his water. FML

Today, I had a bad feeling about walking to work because of the weather. Instead, I drove. My car slid on the ice and I created a four-car pile up. All three of the other people involved have decided to sue me. I should've walked. FML

#21513822
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23391) - you deserved it (3637)

On 01/11/2016 at 1:49am - misc - by krfenton8 -



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