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Today, my boyfriend and I tried roleplaying a teacher-student during sex. We're both studying to be actors, so we ended up going into a really deep, emotional storyline that didn't end in sex at all. FML

#21284275
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36185) - you deserved it (10561)

On 10/24/2014 at 6:54am - intimacy - by too good - United Kingdom (Kent)

JMichael's comment : Did you still have fun with it?

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Today, I got approached by a lady while eating at a fast-food restaurant who asked if I could spare five dollars. Confidently, I pulled out my wallet to show her that I had no cash, only to reveal a perfectly crisp five dollar bill that I had completely forgotten about. FML

#21284180
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28577) - you deserved it (15090)

On 10/24/2014 at 1:02am - money - by Yeah (man) - United States (Texas)

0void0's comment : did you give it to her?

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Today, my best friend and I, after years of sexual tension, began to have sex for the first time. Things got heated and he decided to abruptly stand up with me around him. I got so nervous, spazzed out, and now have 37 staples in my head courtesy of his bookshelf. FML

#21284031
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32248) - you deserved it (5418)

On 10/23/2014 at 9:25pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (New York)

LostMy_Marbles's comment : Rough sex, you're doing it wrong. Seriously though, hope you're ok!

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Today, I was the weird girl on the city bus who falls asleep then makes a loud, weird noise and wakes herself up. FML

#21284017
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29159) - you deserved it (3917)

On 10/23/2014 at 9:05pm - misc - by pyrogypsy (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my wife got a new best-friend. It's my ex-wife. FML

#21283962
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37057) - you deserved it (3603)

On 10/23/2014 at 7:30pm - love - by max - United States (Florida)

Today, I walked into the kitchen at the exact moment my uncle decided to bend over in short shorts. Apparently, his ballsack decided it needed extra room, because it dangled out of his pant leg. FML

#21283844
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35741) - you deserved it (2915)

On 10/23/2014 at 4:05pm - misc - by Alexismaria - United States

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job, mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

#21283795
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34937) - you deserved it (4115)

On 10/23/2014 at 2:43pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I didn't make dinner fast enough so somebody had a yelling and screaming temper tantrum. It would be understandable if the person who threw the tantrum was a child, and not my 57-year-old father. FML

#21283737
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30065) - you deserved it (2445)

On 10/23/2014 at 11:56am - misc - by mnote (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my younger brother helpfully pointed out that I'm the only one in my family of five who is single. He's twelve. FML

#21283583
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33966) - you deserved it (3079)

On 10/23/2014 at 1:18am - love - by 20singleandproudish (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I was passing notes in class with my crush. I started to pour my heart out and tell him about how I've liked him for years. I was caught by the teacher. He looked at it, laughed, and tore it up. He then looked at me and said, "I just saved you from years of embarrassment. You're welcome." FML

#21283544
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37832) - you deserved it (9979)

On 10/23/2014 at 12:04am - love - by Rachel - United States (Ohio)

Today, early in the morning, I got a knock on the door from the police. It seems my son and his friend had been caught throwing toilet paper at a neighbour's house. He's 23. FML

#21283412
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32121) - you deserved it (3439)

On 10/22/2014 at 9:33pm - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML

#21283288
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41009) - you deserved it (3097)

On 10/22/2014 at 6:38pm - intimacy - by BadLuckLad (man) - United Kingdom (Portsmouth)

Today, I had sex for the first time with my first boyfriend. We broke up 6 years ago. FML



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