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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my mom let me know that I'll have to spend my entire tax return on replacing my car brakes. The reason I need new brakes is because almost every single time she uses the car, she floors the gas while the parking brake is still on. FML

Cassandra2015's comment : Mom needs to a) let her son keep his tax money that her son is entitled to, and b) mom needs to pay to have the breaks replaced herself . Good luck OP.

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Today, my internet was out and wasn't due to be fixed until at least Tuesday. I'm a grad student with a lot of online research to do and deadlines to meet, so I desperately bought an expensive and non-returnable portable wifi hub. An hour ago, the internet came back on. FML

#21386971
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26671) - you deserved it (5344)

On 04/03/2015 at 11:08am - work - by WiFucked (woman) - United Kingdom (Durham)

Tonymac617's comment : Library? Isn't that the place to study these days? It's your fault.

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Today, I went to see my ill granddad in hospital. I saw lots of doctors around his bed, and they pronounced him dead, so I ran out crying. A little later, I found out that my granddad had been moved, and it was a different man in his bed. FML

#21386936
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31875) - you deserved it (3384)

On 04/03/2015 at 9:41am - health - by Ravhi Karia - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Markovski's comment : Death in any case is something sad.

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Today, I finally had nice enough weather to dry my clothes on the washing line. Two hours later, all my clothes were stolen. FML

#21386898
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28429) - you deserved it (3333)

On 04/03/2015 at 6:44am - misc - by clothesthief - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I picked up a rock outside and put it in my pocket because it looked cool. A teacher holding the door open stopped me and sent me to the principal. I was confused and asked the teacher why the strict action. She replied that someone has been putting rocks in the toilet. I got a detention. FML

#21386851
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28373) - you deserved it (2510)

On 04/03/2015 at 2:08am - misc - by overreacting - United States (Missouri)

Today, during work hours, I took time off and discreetly went for an interview for a prospective job at our rival company. As soon as I reached the place, I bumped into my current boss. FML

#21386816
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26012) - you deserved it (7577)

On 04/03/2015 at 12:37am - work - by eaglesmile - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I wore a new shirt, but forgot to remove the price tag. It was kind of windy outside, so when I got outside, the tag hit me on the neck, I thought it was a giant insect attacking my neck. I started screaming like a little girl. I'm a 30 year old guy. FML

#21386588
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24414) - you deserved it (7399)

On 04/02/2015 at 3:58pm - misc - by Jordan (man) - Jordan (Al Balqa')

Today, I found out where my stolen car was. It was all the way in Maine. I live in Ohio and I got a $300 fine for illegal parking. FML

#21386559
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27377) - you deserved it (1708)

On 04/02/2015 at 2:47pm - money - by Bunsostriker (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was let go from my internship for "not putting in enough effort". I was working 50 hours a week for almost zero pay. FML

#21386456
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30514) - you deserved it (2272)

On 04/02/2015 at 10:48am - work - by Wellfu (woman) - Europe

Today, I had to give a presentation at school about King Richard III. I realized too late that someone had changed his name to "King Dick" on all the slides. My little sister later broke into hysterics and confessed this had been her April Fool's prank. FML

#21386448
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27653) - you deserved it (2487)

On 04/02/2015 at 10:21am - misc - by King.Dick. (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, my elderly dad once again asked me to make a reservation at a restaurant for him and a younger woman he's been seeing. Meanwhile, I haven't had anything even approaching a real date in over a decade. FML

#21386446
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23051) - you deserved it (2857)

On 04/02/2015 at 10:19am - love - by Anonymous -

Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML

#21386410
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26590) - you deserved it (2854)

On 04/02/2015 at 8:51am - health - by RomanceFail - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I was shopping with my boyfriend when we came across the most beautiful piece of Japanese furniture. When I inspected it closely, my boyfriend started laughing. Turns out I was making the same noise I make when I orgasm in reaction to a piece of furniture. FML

#21386402
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25268) - you deserved it (4140)

On 04/02/2015 at 8:20am - misc - by Repethetic (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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