Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text, right after I finished cleaning his apartment and dropping off a bunch of booze I bought for a big party we were having. It turns out that big party was his "newly single" party. FML
by Reeen / 06/03/2016 at 6:29pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love
heirofhope's comment : That's awful, but there were signs. If he has his own apartment, he's an adult (physically, at least), which means he should have been cleaning it himself, and you cleaning it for him wasn't a very good idea, even if you had kind intentions. If I were you I would drive over and take back what you bought, or at the very least let everyone know what kind of person he really is. I'm sorry you got used like that. People can be cruel.
Today, as part of my job at a pet store, I helped our frat house president pick out goldfish for the new aquarium the big brothers are installing over summer break. And, once I'm initiated, I'll get to swallow one of the fish. FML
by Fish Breath / 06/03/2016 at 6:26pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
HollyQuinn's comment : That's absolutely gross and mean. Frats are awful.
Today, I went to get my first acupuncture. The doctor was a cute Korean woman, so I tried to start a conversation. When she pricked me with a needle near the tailbone, I involuntarily let one loose and saw her gag. FML
by Revelyn / 06/03/2016 at 6:18pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
ScratchCatPower's comment : Well, you couldn't help it. If she's an acupuncture doctor I'm sure she's dealt with it before. You'll survive.
Today, a large spider climbed inside my lunchbox while my mom was making me sandwiches. She didn't tell me about it until after I got home from school, though, and only because I mentioned a strange aftertaste in the sandwiches. She said she didn't want me to worry over lunch because she knows I hate spiders. FML
by Arachnaphobe / 06/03/2016 at 6:14pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I regret calling my hardass boss a cocksucking bastard when I quit a few months back. My new job just laid me off, and I could desperately use a good reference from the aforementioned cocksucking bastard. FML
by larsn / 06/03/2016 at 4:32pm / United States (Texas) / Work
by Anonymous / 06/03/2016 at 3:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Bogrbon / 06/03/2016 at 3:18pm / United States (Indiana) / Health
by RoseRodent / 06/03/2016 at 1:58pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous
by Joshua / 06/03/2016 at 1:53pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by jeffcarp / 06/03/2016 at 12:13pm / Italy (Emilia-Romagna) / Work
by theamazingd / 06/01/2016 at 4:31pm / United States (New York) / Transportation
by Dixienornous / 06/03/2016 at 7:05am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous