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Today, I gave a presentation to my college class about life with Tourette syndrome. I only got 3 minutes into it before my asswipe classmates started yelling stuff like "Shit!", "Cock!", and "Bob Saget!" I gave up and went back to my seat in tears as our bored instructor said "Next." FML

#21334608
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34649) - you deserved it (2350)

On 01/10/2015 at 5:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

BeastyMcbeast's comment : I would imagine that college students would have the maturity level to act like adults for a small portion of their life. But i guess some people can't. Sorry to hear Op. Some people still act like 7th graders even when they're adults and its a tad stupid to put it frankly

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Today, my girlfriend was making lunch and asked me to pass her the peanut butter. I'll never know why, but as I handed it to her I said the first thing that came to mind: "I really want a dog." She looked at me in horror, then told me to get out of her house. FML

#21334531
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24104) - you deserved it (4258)

On 01/10/2015 at 3:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

addisonrose12's comment : What's the big deal?

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Today, I went to the supermarket with my husband and kids. A crazy old man started yelling at us and challenged us to fight him outside. Security had to escort us to our car. Why was he so mad? Our cart momentarily blocked his path to the beef jerky samples. FML

#21334513
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28691) - you deserved it (2876)

On 01/10/2015 at 2:22pm - misc - by gotta_respond (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found three of my sister's dildos as I helped her unpack boxes for her new house. Jokingly, I said, "Why would you even need three?!" She actually explained. FML

#21334501
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30273) - you deserved it (9979)

On 01/10/2015 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by sisterlylove - United States (Missouri)

Bricktothehead's comment : You definitely walked into that one.

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Today, I had to go back to the restaurant I had just eaten at and beg for my tip back so I could afford my bus home. FML

Today, I accidentally sent my teacher a picture of me in my boyfriend's boxers instead of my essay. FML

#21334385
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24646) - you deserved it (18761)

On 01/10/2015 at 9:35am - misc - by kb (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my fiancée got married. I did not. FML

#21334376
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42993) - you deserved it (2731)

On 01/10/2015 at 8:45am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, three weeks after my sister took in a wounded porcupine from our backyard and let it roam about the house, I learned that it sheds quills from time to time. How did I learn this? By stepping on three of said quills hidden in the carpet. I still have only managed to pull one out. FML

Today, I found my intoxicated step-father in our back yard trying to domesticate a stray opossum, attempting to give it steak and malt liquor. FML

#21334215
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26109) - you deserved it (1908)

On 01/09/2015 at 10:41pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were going to sext before going to sleep. It was very late, but I said I'd stay up for him. He sent a text asking me if I was ready. Me replying "yes" was the last thing I remember before I fell asleep on my horny boyfriend. FML

#21334154
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27357) - you deserved it (8014)

On 01/09/2015 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend gave me my first ever orgasm. Then he bitched me out for insulting his intelligence, saying it was "blatantly fake" and that "women don't orgasm like that". FML

#21334061
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32679) - you deserved it (2702)

On 01/09/2015 at 6:09pm - intimacy - by good2know (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went to work and said hi to my boss. He reached towards me. I thought he was trying to give me a hug, so I awkwardly hugged him back. Turned out he was just trying to fix my shirt collar. FML

#21334002
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26450) - you deserved it (3764)

On 01/09/2015 at 4:17pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I tried baking my own bread to save food money. Unfortunately I screwed it up, prompting my wife to look at me pityingly and say "Wow, can't get even bread to rise." before walking out. I have erectile dysfunction, and she constantly insults me like this. FML

#21333974
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38749) - you deserved it (3043)

On 01/09/2015 at 3:16pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States



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