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Today, I put on a porno, trying to unwind after a bad day. 10 minutes in, I was so pissed off with the girl constantly repeating "You like that? Yeah?" and the cameraman's obsession with the guy's asscrack that I started yelling at the screen. Now I'm more stressed than ever. FML

#21232670
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36140) - you deserved it (11563)

On 08/08/2014 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by FUCK YOU (man) - United States

ChaCerCam's comment : If you were that angry over a guys ass crack, just watch lesbian porn?

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Today, I finally felt ready for intimacy with my boyfriend, and I sent him a sexy picture of myself topless. He texted back, "Ewwwww." FML

#21232655
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42501) - you deserved it (6665)

On 08/08/2014 at 5:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Israel

KatHelm's comment : Get a new boyfriend?

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Today, I realized that my dog, who's 11, eats his own shit, and chews bones like crazy still has 10 times nicer teeth than I do. FML

#21232602
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31463) - you deserved it (7337)

On 08/08/2014 at 3:34pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

junkman6's comment : "Good morning Dave."

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Today, I fell asleep in the doctor's waiting room. When I woke up, the room was empty, and there was a $1 bill tucked into my cleavage. FML

#21232452
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35923) - you deserved it (5949)

On 08/08/2014 at 10:43am - misc - by freakedout (woman) - United States

Today, as a last resort for my back problems, I tried acupuncture. After the needles were placed and the doctor had left, I couldn't move for 30 minutes. I had a panic attack. FML

#21232393
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35124) - you deserved it (4252)

On 08/08/2014 at 8:26am - health - by screwed - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I saw a cute guy walking out of a restaurant. When he saw me, he smiled and to be a bit flirty I bit my lip. Too bad it started to bleed like hell. FML

#21232320
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33328) - you deserved it (11191)

On 08/08/2014 at 3:40am - love - by alisaav (woman) - Thailand

Today, my boss pretty much told me that I'm too ugly to meet clients, and should stay in the office doing the paperwork. So basically, I'm a modern day Hunchback of Notre Dame. FML

#21232284
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36931) - you deserved it (3169)

On 08/08/2014 at 2:13am - work - by Anonymous - Singapore

Today, I got a call from my very drunk boyfriend at 1:30am asking for my permission to have sex with a "gross fat chick" he met at a pub, because he "felt sorry for her". The conversation ended with me getting hung up on because I "don't have a heart". FML

#21232277
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44817) - you deserved it (3968)

On 08/08/2014 at 2:05am - intimacy - by pocketrocket90 (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my husband jolted in bed and while still half-asleep said, "I had a nightmare; I dreamt we had a kid." I'm 8 months pregnant. FML

#21232311
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39563) - you deserved it (3115) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/08/2014 at 12:27am - kids - by mamagelmane (woman) - France (Lorraine)

Today, I went with my girlfriend to the gym for the first time. I knew I was in bad shape, but I bet her that I could lift more than her. Not only did I get my ass handed to me by a 5', 115lbs girl in front of the entire gym, I also have to attend Zumba in bright pink spandex. FML

#21231691
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26275) - you deserved it (37858)

On 08/07/2014 at 11:36am - health - by Dancing King (man) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, one of my customer's pipes were blocked. As I went to unblock it, about a handful of used condoms collided with my face. I don't know if I should be disgusted by this or disgusted by my customer. FML

#21231545
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43065) - you deserved it (3810)

On 08/07/2014 at 5:09am - intimacy - by failallday (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I managed to get a €5 note tangled in the zip on my purse. I couldn't open it without ripping it to shreds. FML

#21231531
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33346) - you deserved it (4578)

On 08/07/2014 at 4:23am - money - by MoMoneyMoProblems (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)



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