Today, I confessed to my girlfriend that I cheated on her. She told me that she needed time to think, and left. An hour later, her dad came by with a baseball bat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20919) - you deserved it (107148)
On 05/28/2013 at 12:51pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)
Today, after being told by her therapist to try to make her kids a bigger part of her life because we're so distant from her, my mom's new favorite thing to do is to constantly use the words "YOLO" and "swag" around us. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45136) - you deserved it (4501)
On 05/28/2013 at 12:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was walking down the stairs with my guitar in hand, singing "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing" to my wife. I sang, "I don't wanna close my eyes, I don't wanna fall". Before I could say "asleep", I fell down the stairs. My wife almost pissed her pants laughing. My bum hurts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55643) - you deserved it (11979)
On 05/28/2013 at 12:37pm - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
↑ pandaboy123's comment : Hope your guitar is okay.
Today, I was visiting my new in-laws for the first time. During an awkward silence, I took my phone and figured I'd send my friend a text jokingly saying "Mayday, mayday! Somebody save me!" My mood lightened up a little and I felt quite well until my mother-in-law's phone beeped. Yep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20214) - you deserved it (39375)
On 05/28/2013 at 7:12am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)
↑ SkoomaKi's comment : Are you the same guy that "accidentally"sent a nude picture to his best friend? You really need to check the person you're sending the message to.
Today, I was stuck home with a cold when my boyfriend's best friend sent me a text saying, "You doing alright?" I replied, thinking he was talking about my health. He replied, "I'm surprised you're taking the breakup so well." What breakup? Mine. He was ten minutes too soon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47555) - you deserved it (2268)
On 05/28/2013 at 4:09am - love - by really? (woman) - United States (California)
Today, while working at Walmart, I was walking the sales floor and passed the end of an aisle. I saw a customer coming at me from the corner of my eye, so I jumped backwards. I hit a display case, and watched it topple over before turning to apologize to the customer. It was a ladder. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31832) - you deserved it (7996)
On 05/28/2013 at 3:11am - work - by Olerbia - United States
Today, I was sending intimate pictures to my girlfriend and accidentally sent one to my best friend. He sent me one back. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44724) - you deserved it (26650)
On 05/28/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by Abrams52 (man) - United States (Indiana)
Today, my grandma's chihuahua was run over while I was taking her for a walk. She later whispered to me, "It should have been you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (50005) - you deserved it (5917)
On 05/28/2013 at 1:05am - animals - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I was working at a place where if you're tipped, you sing. After a lady paid for her ice cream, she pulled out 5 dollars. Thinking it was a tip, I took it, and sang the song. She didn't mean to tip me. I was stopped by the woman slapping me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37479) - you deserved it (11622)
On 05/27/2013 at 8:56pm - work - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I got to wash my ex-wife's dishes at her apartment while her new boyfriend played with my daughter in the living room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46774) - you deserved it (9605)
On 05/27/2013 at 7:34pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I waxed my upper lip hair. My boyfriend later told me that he missed my mustache rubbing onto his. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40167) - you deserved it (4557)
On 05/27/2013 at 7:10pm - love - by mustache girl - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my in-laws came for dinner. My 5-year-old son chose that as the perfect time to say, "Good girls always swallow!" when my daughter coughed up some of her food. I have no idea where he heard it, but my mother-in-law blamed me, and my wife had to convince her not to call CPS on me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39737) - you deserved it (2716)
On 05/27/2013 at 6:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Utah)
Today, a girl at my tanning salon was ranting about how expensive it was and how she wished there was a cheaper way to get a tan. I joked, "Like from the sun?" She angrily called me a "sassy bitch", screamed to my boss about me, and then threatened to sue us when he kicked her out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41253) - you deserved it (3446)
On 05/27/2013 at 4:18pm - work - by fuck you retail (woman) - United States (California)
Monday 17 June 2013
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↑ Pyon's comment : YDI for cheating...
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