Today, I went on a blind date that my sister had set up. When I arrived at the coffeeshop, I approached a man waiting by the counter, asking if his name was Tim (my date's name). He looked at me and said no and then left with a drink clearly labeled "Tim" in bold letters. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58017) - you deserved it (3381)
On 03/01/2009 at 11:20pm - love - by oprahahaha (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, i walked into starbucks for a job application. I asked the manager if they were hiring, I really need a job. He looked me up and down and replied, " NO". There was a 'now hiring' sign in the window. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36031) - you deserved it (3747)
On 03/01/2009 at 10:03pm - work - by timmyb (man) - United States (California)
Today, a customer opened with "you open bottles with them thangs?" I look around my desk for something he might confuse with an actual bottle opener. His girlfriend then informs me he is talking about my breasts. I work for a bank. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35222) - you deserved it (2873)
On 03/01/2009 at 9:31pm - work - by bottlepoppin (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend, whom I was madly in love with, by having a plane fly over her house spelling "Marry me Abby?". After seeing this, she locked herself in her room and cried for 4 hours exclaiming that this wasn't how she wanted to be proposed to. I had invited my entire family. FML
I agree, your life sucks (80763) - you deserved it (8509)
On 03/01/2009 at 8:41pm - love - by groomfail (man) - United States (District of Columbia)
Today, I borrowed a van to move some of my furniture. I wasn't used to the brakes so when I stopped at a red light, I pretty much ended up in the cross walk. Suddenly I heard a loud thud at the side of the van. I turned to see what idiot would walk into a van. It was a blind man. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10623) - you deserved it (38181)
On 03/01/2009 at 8:09pm - misc - by jazojigga (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend and his family had invited me to go on a Tropical family trip with them. When we got to the airport, security stopped me and opened my carry-on bag. I'd forgotten about the no-liquids rule. They took out a bottle of Massage Oil, Lube, Vagasil and Nair. His whole family saw. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20916) - you deserved it (54641)
On 03/01/2009 at 6:38pm - intimacy - by Kammy (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, two days before my birthday, my parents drove three hours to visit me at school and take me out to lunch. I assumed that it was to celebrate my birthday. They told me they are getting divorced. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57034) - you deserved it (1858)
On 03/01/2009 at 6:27pm - misc - by Meh (man) - United States (Iowa)
Today, my family gathered at my 96 year old great-grandmother's surprise birthday party that was my idea. When she walked in, we surprised her so much that she literally had a heart attack. She is now in the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47584) - you deserved it (9042)
On 03/01/2009 at 5:04pm - misc - by Ashley J. (woman) - United States (West Virginia)
Today, my mom had my girlfriend and I over. Out of the blue, she pulled out my grandmother's wedding ring and gave it to me saying I can now propose. My girlfriend started screaming and said yes. I have been seeing someone else for 3 months and was going to break up with my girlfriend tomorrow. FML
I agree, your life sucks (85888) - you deserved it (192463)
On 03/01/2009 at 4:58pm - love - by MrCanoe (man) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, my cat was in the bathroom when I was undressing to get into the shower. I realized that he was the only male to have seen me naked in the past two months. Then he started scratching the door for me to let him out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44012) - you deserved it (7123)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:36pm - animals - by catlady (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was babysitting this one year old. She just learned how to say yes so if you asked her ANYTHING, she'd say yes. I asked her if she liked vegetables and she said "yes!" Then I asked her if I was pretty... she looked at me and said "NO." FML
I agree, your life sucks (52451) - you deserved it (10498)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:29pm - kids - by hi (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I got a phone call from my mother asking me if I was okay. Confused, I asked her what she meant. She then told me that my boyfriend had broken up with me, and she just wanted to make sure I was handling it alright. I had to find out my relationship was over from my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (62038) - you deserved it (2451)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:02pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I typed an essay on my friend's computer, so she forwarded it to me in a email and she made the subject "here bitch" as a joke. I then went to email the essay to my teacher. I forwarded it thinking nothing of it only to realize that I didn't change the subject name. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16291) - you deserved it (43187)
On 03/01/2009 at 3:00pm - misc - by Brittany (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Friday 24 May 2013
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