Today, my girlfriend and I were having ice cream and I jokingly asked, "What's better? The sex or ice cream?" Apparently, I don't pleasure her like Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream does. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend of two years expressing my feelings for her. She responded with, "I'm going to bed." FML
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob. It gave him a panic attack. FML
Today, a long standing fantasy was ruined when the only lasting impression from my first threesome was of how good my boyfriend is at giving other guys a blowjob. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend on our couch. Meanwhile, my parents came to visit us without telling me. FML
Today, my 23-year old boyfriend is not talking to me because I bought the regular kind of macaroni and cheese instead of the cartoon kind. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML
Today, at a red light, my mom started to tell me that she and my dad hadn't had sex in months, that they "probably won't bounce back from this one," and are most likely getting a divorce. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to shower together, and things were getting heated until we actually got into the shower and found my roommate's fingernail clippings all over the place. FML
Today, the girl I have a crush on texted me to go out tonight. When I got to her house, she peered at me quizzically and asked, "What do you want? Did I text you?" FML
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Top comments
Intoxicunt 6
So rub mint chocolate chip ice cream on your dick. She'll be all over it. :]
lmmmr 0
Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to. YDI.
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Comments (180)
xstaticdelta 6
LOL that does suck
chobbest 0
dude shut the fu*k up, it was obviously a joke.
emorockerownage 9
calm down and how about you shutting the **** up and YDI but its hard to beat mint chip my friend maybe if you lasted longer than 10 seconds you might have a chance
IgniteMe28 0
maybe she "jokingly" responded...?
genius_man16 1
Seriously. Grow some balls you dumbass. How many FML's are on here where the roles are reversed and a girl asks her boyfriend what's better, sex or video games? And then he says video games and she gets all bent out of shape. Roles reversed, same response: YDI for not having a sense of humor you twat.
CyclonePsycho 1
If it was Cold Stone, then I understand.
Klumm 3
mint choc chip is the best.
septemberlovebug 0
dude Cold Stone ftw.. Birthday Cake Remix is the shit!
xxbadassbitchxx 0
mint chocolate is ****** awesome
piinkbunnii 1
Dude, idk what flavor you were eating, but mint chocolate chip is badass!!!
fmlthepornaddict 0
someone needs a blowup doll to practice with xD FYL
gtdoll 0
didnt u know that mint chcoclate chip OWNS!?!?! it doesn't own as good as turtles thou. NOTHING can own better than turles.
DameGreyWulf 1
No, actually, better idea: bring the ice cream to bed. Problem solved.
cheesefest 0
WIN.
turtlemanz 8
omg u like turtles too??
Intoxicunt 6
So rub mint chocolate chip ice cream on your dick. She'll be all over it. :]
Chubtubdaplaya 0
#3 for the win
justanotherhuman 21
...while yes, that *could be* hot... it's also *definitely* cold. So very, very cold. And yet... *that* could be hot... Okay, stopping now.
Heckron 0
Awesome response...go #3
bexox 0
20- Some people use ice cubes in foreplay. The OP could also use an ice cream cone as a condom.
lmmmr 0
That sounds... ineffective... at best.
bexox 0
Yeah, it was a joke. I have a very tongue-in-cheek sense of humor. I hope to god no one would ever try that.
liveBabylon 0
**** yeah!
tati3092 1
yeah that's a great idea I think any girl would be all over dicks if it had there favorite ice cream all over it.
Chubtubdaplaya 0
I agree with #3
nyc203 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
**** her. shes probably a fattie.
cocogrande73 0
duh that's just what i was saying.. i jus didn't want to repeat, but yeah she sounds like a fatty!
meowmeowwkitty 0
hahahahahaha
Think_Tink 0
Never ask that question, I said the same answer.
lmmmr 0
Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to. YDI.
coopcas 0
Who does? It's Moose Tracks that gets me, though. Mmm.
KyraAlcor 0
lmfao
nomadxx7 0
This is like the FMLs from women saying the men wanted sandwiches or some other food after/during sex. Whatever, either work on the motion in the ocean, watch some lesbian pornos and get some tips or as #3 stated lather up in Mint Chocolate Chip and have her go to town. Either way suck it up and learn from the situation.
iain08 2
for her birthday get her 250 gallons of mint chocolate ice cream, then call her a fat bitch who can't get laid.
lmmmr 0
Why?
HeWhoEatsAll423 0
She won't want to get laid after all of that ice cream. It is better.