Today, my girlfriend and I were having ice cream and I jokingly asked, "What's better? The sex or ice cream?" Apparently, I don't pleasure her like Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream does. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had been sick all day, so to cheer me up my dad drove me to get ice cream. On our way back, we hit a puppy. FML
Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend of two years expressing my feelings for her. She responded with, "I'm going to bed." FML
Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob. It gave him a panic attack. FML
Today, a long standing fantasy was ruined when the only lasting impression from my first threesome was of how good my boyfriend is at giving other guys a blowjob. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend on our couch. Meanwhile, my parents came to visit us without telling me. FML
Today, my 23-year old boyfriend is not talking to me because I bought the regular kind of macaroni and cheese instead of the cartoon kind. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over so that we could have some "fun". It turns out, his idea of foreplay is squishing my breasts together and making them talk. FML
Today, at a red light, my mom started to tell me that she and my dad hadn't had sex in months, that they "probably won't bounce back from this one," and are most likely getting a divorce. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to shower together, and things were getting heated until we actually got into the shower and found my roommate's fingernail clippings all over the place. FML
Today, the girl I have a crush on texted me to go out tonight. When I got to her house, she peered at me quizzically and asked, "What do you want? Did I text you?" FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Intoxicunt 6
So rub mint chocolate chip ice cream on your dick. She'll be all over it. :]
lmmmr 0
Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to. YDI.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (180)
teuscherchoklit 0
I would have said ice cream, too...
freddie_fml 0
Don't feel bad. No guy on earth could satisfy like chocolate chip mint ice cream can.
DeathShad0 1
Ice cream is made of rainbows and dreams. Of course the ice creams better, idiot.
mrlucky4444 0
MINT CHOCOLATE CHIP IS AMAZING
amaranthphantom 0
what's with all the loaded question fml's?? stop asking stupid questions and you won't have to post on here dumbasses.
athos1237 4
YDI for asking such a stupid question. Yes there is such a thing as a stupid question contrary to what some will have you believe. That plus Mint Chocolate Chip rocks, and clearly you don't.
Dragonmouth 4
I'd say that about 40% of FML's are people taking jokes too seriously.
PaulieeBooMN 0
NO WHAT THE ****!!! PEOPLE NEVER JOKE! and 80% of comment replies are from taking an original comment to seriously
Daaniellee1234 8
hey, you asked a question and got an answer. mint chocolate chip ice cream is nasty. cotton candy ice cream is the way to go !
sublime93 0
Ew mint chocolate chip is ******* disgusting
jewelzgalore 0
Hey dude, mint chocolate chip is f-ing good. Can't blame her.