Today, my long distance boyfriend got angry because I like touching myself while we sext. It "distracts" me from him. I'm sorry you turn me on. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend is upset with me for not wanting to sext. I can't sext with her because she adds "lol" to everything, which turns me off. FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend would rather jerk off to porn than to ever touch me, even if I wear a naughty outfit. FML
Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML
Today, I was sending my boyfriend dirty texts to try and turn him on so when I see him the next day he will want to get intimate. Twenty minutes later he texts back, "ew stop." FML
Today, I came home to find my boyfriend playing with himself. He got mad and said I "killed the mood". How? By coming home. FML
Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me. I told him that I couldn't wait to get home and take care of him. He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad. FML
Today, I came home early from work and caught my boyfriend jerking off. When I tried to flirt and say I could help him, he said he wasn't in the mood anymore. He hasn't touched me in months. FML
Today, I was with my boyfriend, and things were getting pretty heated. Trying to be sexy, I told him that every time we touched was a guilty pleasure. He rolled off of me, and said "Oh, you're married too?" FML
Today, my boyfriend got mad at me when his so-called "ways to turn me on" didn't work. What were these ways? Flicking my nips and inserting his finger in my belly button. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't know what it's like to be turned on. Apparently, I've been doing something wrong for the past two years. FML
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Top comments
Calingaladha 21
Yeah, I'm sure his hands stay glued to that phone, too.
cksmith51 14
I honestly don't see why he'd have a problem with it. Does he not realize he's the one causing it?
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Comments (63)
TeasinDaNoobs 16
Lol op
MiaTheMartian 21
That's selfish of him. You're just as important as him in that situation.
cosmicdancer84 7
is he controlling your masturbation habits?? **** that, that's so selfish and petty.
savemeSheehan 8
dudes can be so selfish. id suggest not making it a permanent relationship as hes probably that selfish in person
tiredofwaiting 25
He sounds like a control freak.
Uuuuxc 7
dump the shit out of him right now
AJGrote_89 6
Gurl, I feel your pain...FML
GhostFox 34
This sounds rather alarming, honestly. If he's this focused on what he should get out of it over the phone, I would be worried about what he would be like if the two of you were together in person. There's also the fact he's basically saying his pleasure is more important than yours, which is not good for healthy sex habits with a partner. I'd keep an eye out for more abusive personality red flags, OP.
NETFLIXISTHELIFE 6
it's like ur the one causing it boi
SailorKelly 7
This is a RED FLAG. Long distance relationships are great but it's easier to hide abusive traits and sometimes people are completely different in person. If he's already this controlling then it's only going to get worse in the future. If he's trying to police how you touch your OWN body, imagine how he might react if he felt jealous or threatened. Please be safe.