Today, while working at the daycare, I had to clean the entire place. During the next four hours, I scooped up three human teeth, a rotten log of shit, a tire iron, a condom wrapper, and a yogurt that expired in 2003. I only cleaned the place a week ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, one of the kids at the daycare center I work at was so excited at the fact that his constipation was over, he felt the need to bring me his fecal matter, in his hands, to show me. Guess who had to clean up the aftermath. FML
Today, I had to clean up human poop that someone trailed through the store. Then, as I was cleaning up all the shelves at the end of the day, I saw that someone had changed their sanitary pad, took a new one out of the packed and used it, then left the used one on the shelf. FML
Today, I got home from a long day of work and saw a pile of dog puke on the kitchen floor. I went to get paper towels and found a pile of dog shit. With my foot. Both of my kids were home all day and left the piles for me to clean because "that's gross". FML
Today, I had to clean human excrement at work when the fitting room turned into the shitting room. FML
Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML
Today, at work in a library, I found a dirty diaper stuffed under one of the public use computer desks. Not only was it leaking, but it had been run over several times by a rolling office chair. I had to clean it up. FML
Today, I started my new job as a janitor at a store. The first thing that happened when I came in was another employee telling me that there was vomit in the restroom, and that I had to clean it up. Not only did I clean up vomit, I had to clean up the poop that made the kid puke in the first place. FML
Today, while working at a fast food restaurant, I stayed a little overtime to help my manager with dishes. A kid pooped in the slide in the playground area attached to the restaurant itself. I'm the smallest one there. I had to crawl UP the slide to find and clean the poop. FML
Today, I work in a grocery store and a woman suffering from diarrhea somehow managed to get shit up and down two of the store aisles, then go to the ladies room and mess up the stall. I was the only one working trained in deal with bio-hazardous waste so I had to clean it up. FML
Today, I went into the tanning room at work, where the lady in there last had decided the trash can was a toilet and pooped in it. Before she sat, she took the time to wrap the edges in paper towels, I guess in case anyone else had done this before her. I had to clean it up. FML
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Top comments
FMLpuppy 3
And this is a daycare for children?
trellz17 19
A used condom wrapper? What the hell are those kids doing!
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Comments (210)
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Kids these days. Sheesh.
Schizomaniac 24
"A log of shit, human teeth, and condom wrappers can all be found in THIS workplace." Well I definitely would not guess "daycare," Alex. Damn.
gc327072 31
I spy "ghetto daycare" edition I spy a log of poo, a stuffed dog, a stuffed frog, and a small toy zoo. An iron for a tire, a yogurt that's expired, some teeth from a fight and a condom by the light.
loserboii 11
I wonder if the condom was used. That'd make for a more interesting story.
Jaxx66 21
I'll take a 'Crack-house-brothel' for $500, Alex! Wait... I lost?
Blue329 15
Talk about disgusting environment to work in
TheOath 12
That's very unhygienic for those children...I bet they don't brush before going to bed!!
day624 14
Condom wrapper at a daycare?
unknown_user5566 27
I hope you called the health department after that. Horror stories about day cares make me never want to put my future children in their care.
perdix 31
Considering that in many states, the training required for cutting hair or painting nails is far more rigorous than it is for taking care of children, you'd be well-served to be a stay-at-home mom while your kids are very small.
beacbum7 7
What kind of institution do you run?!?!
0ops_i_died 8
In pretty sure OP just works there.
samasara 20
Seems like some workers were getting frisky.
perdix 31
Last week, you must have done a shitty job.
sheethapins 13
It's like a scavenger hunt! Now to put together the clues and find out what they have in common...
perdix 31
Well, let's see. If the yogurt had been eaten properly, the log of shit would be resplendent in probiotic glory. The teeth and the condom indicate a safe sex ******* given by someone with meth mouth, which is ironic since they "paid" for their meth by beating their dealer to death with a tire iron.
fernclogger 5
Three human teeth??? Saw 3?