Today, when I was done masturbating to the thought of my crush I noticed my phone was lit up. I turned it over and stared in horror as I saw a call connected to him. I had been loudly moaning his name. I guess I hit his speed dial when I was setting my phone down. He was definitely still on the line. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I somehow managed to FaceTime my crush instead of texting him. I panicked, dropped my phone, then answered the call with an unflattering close-up of my forehead. FML
Today, the phone rang so I went to answer it. No one was there. A minute later the phone rang again and no one answered so I assumed it was a telemarketer or a prank so I started swearing uncontrollably in rage. Turns out it was my crush calling to ask me out, but she was too nervous to ask. FML
Today, my crush and I were talking on the phone and we were really hitting it off. We got on the subject of sex and I told him I have a purity ring. Then he suddenly said he had to go and hang up. FML
Today, I got my crush's phone number. I started texting him and once I told him who it was, he stopped replying. FML
Today, me and my boyfriend decided to have some fun in my room before my parents got home. My phone started vibrating half-way through, and when I saw my mom's picture, I reflexively answered. It wasn't a phone call. It was a FaceTime. Busted. FML
Today, my crush asked to use my phone so he could Google something. Flattered that he wanted to use my phone, I agreed. After he was done, he handed it back with a weird look. I later realized he had found himself in my top searches. FML
Today, I got a text from my crush. In my clumsy attempt to quickly grab the phone, I knocked it off the kitchen counter and cracked the screen. After driving to my friend's house so I could put my sim card in her phone, I saw that the text said, "Who is this? Stop texting me." FML
Today, after getting off the phone with a client, I got horny so I put on some porn and cranked one out. After I'd finished, I realized I hadn't ended the call and neither had my client. They heard everything. FML
Today, I accidentally called out the coworker I have a crush on’s name in bed instead of my wife’s. The thing is, thinking about her is the only thing that will keep me hard and brought to orgasm. FML
Today, I woke up after having had sex with my 4-year crush expecting to find him in bed next to me. Instead, I found my cell phone with a text message from him that said "you should really do something about the pimples on your ass." FML
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Top comments
aelabed 17
Need a follow up on this
inappropes 31
At least he knows you like him(alot). Now make the move to ask him out lol.
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Comments (38)
aelabed 17
Need a follow up on this
Dave_Davington 34
OP's probably going to change her identity and flee the country. I doubt anyone will ever hear from her again.
tonyfan00 38
At least it wasn't someone else...for example, your mother.
pastafanatic 13
I could not imagine your embarrassment. My apologies OP. But I do agree with others, we definitely need a follow up on this.
inappropes 31
At least he knows you like him(alot). Now make the move to ask him out lol.
Danne696 14
Do you realize how creepy it would seem for someone to call just to ********** over the phone and then ask you out on a date?
inappropes 31
Obvisouly they will need to talk about the call. It will be awkward. and then later in a relationship it is something they can look back on and be happy it happened.
iny0urjuicebox 7
if a girl called me moaning my name, I would be the exact opposite of creeped out if she asked to go on a date. actually, I think that I would ask her out before she even got the chance to, lol
ttuseth 7
Beyond cringe worthy. So sorry.
Dave_Davington 34
Not gonna lie, there's no recovering from a **** up of that magnitude.
bjnono001 20
Say it was a prank
griddy24 18
Unless he’s super into it!
RichardPencil 32
Of course he was, he wasn’t finished masturbating to your phone sex call. Hopefully, he’ll want to escalate to real life soon.
azouwa 26
Sounds like something a teen would do on purpose.
ahhna 7
exactly my thoughts!
iceychiida 8
He was either mortified or turned on. I'm thinking if he was on your speed dial, you'll get to laugh it off. Hopefully.
raven_of_azarath 35
I also feel like if he hadn't hung up after hearing it, then he probably wasn't mortified. Or OP could have been "lucky," and it went to voicemail. A quick text saying, "Just butt dialed you, sorry." should be enough to get him to not even listen to it.
Miss_080 21
People still use speed dial?