Today, while meeting my girlfriend's parents for the first time, her dad made a big show of cleaning his rifle, before loading it, taking aim, and blowing the hell out of a hornet's nest at the back of the yard. I fear for my life. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I met my girlfriend's parents. Her dad showed me his gun collection, and said the first rule of gun safety is never to point a gun at something you don't intend to kill. All while waving a handgun in my direction and glaring at me with barely suppressed rage. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's father for the first time. The first thing he did was show me a bullet, then he basically said that if I don't submit to his daughter's every whim, that bullet will end my life. FML
Today, my first time meeting my girlfriend's dad ended with him chasing me from his house and trying to hit me with a baseball bat. FML
Today, I tested out my new paintball gun by firing a few rounds into some thick bushes. Nothing could've prepared me for the angry swarm of hornets whose nest I'd apparently shot. I'm in so much pain. FML
Today, my girlfriend dragged me along to one of her family's paintball matches. Her father is a former marine, and hates my guts. He kept going well out of his way to hunt me down and pump as many rounds into me as possible without causing a scene. FML
Today, while I was pulling weeds, my dad thought it would be absolutely hilarious to yell "Hey, son!" then unload his gun at me when I turned around. After I'd screamed like a bitch and pissed myself, he broke down into hysterical laughter and said he'd loaded the gun with blanks. Fuck you, dad. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad for the first time. His shirt said "D.A.D.D, Dads Against Daughters Dating, shoot the first one and word will spread". FML
Today, my girlfriend met my parents for the first time. The first thing my mom said to my girlfriend was, "Honey, are you ok? You look like you got hives." FML
Today, I met my girlfriend’s parents for the first time. Her dad killed and skinned a goat in front of me, while staring at me the whole time. FML
Today, I went shooting with my dad and he brought his grandfather's rifle with him. I’ve never shot it before and he told me to be careful with it. The bullet exploded, ruptured the barrel, cut my face, and made me deaf in one ear. Dad still blamed me for “not shooting it properly.” FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
You should fear for your life only if you use your stinger on his daughter. Or if you wear a yellow jacket. That wouldn't be wise.
The_Big_Boss 20
That's when you tell him what guns you have and offer to go shooting with him sometime
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Comments (188)
mrcook9 5
Most guys are dicks. He just wanted to show you what he's gonna do to you if you're one. And yes, I have a complete right to say that because I am a guy.
Hph723 12
Normal
whys0serious 12
I really don't get fathers like that, are people actually that stupid? Can't they find a better solution to keep their daughters save? Haven't they thought about being good role models to their children instead of advocating violence? Still, OP, be a man instead of a pitiful pussy. If you like the girl don't be afraid of such nonsense. If not, then take the hint and don't waste each other's time. If you want to take care of your girlfriend and to be treated respectfully, you can't start ******** yourself in the pants at the smallest sign of trouble.
technomom 5
don't worry he's just marking his turf and giving you a friendly warning not to a stupid horny teen if you he will just kill you. that's life.... how much is second base worth to you? rofl
Cwhite118 6
Scared? Lol sounds like yer a city slicker, I would have asked him about the gun, and then congratulated him on the shot.
srhearrell 21
I hate to say this, but almost any dad you meet will do that. They really love their daughters.
VolcanoTheDragon 20
Thats america for you...
kittykat1501 31
Then it worked!
Solano2580 24
He won't do anything. If he even threatened to harm you then you can file charges.