Today, while having sex with my girlfriend for the first time, I pushed all the way in. She said, "Stop teasing me, put everything in." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was fooling around with my girlfriend for the first time. She put her hand on my cock over my jeans and said, "Get hard for me." I was hard. FML
Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML
Today, I made love to my girlfriend. I penetrated her for a while, then stopped to get my breath back... She carried on moaning even though I'd stopped moving. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend and as I pulled out to finish I slipped and ended up punching her in the stomach, I came while she was writhing in pain. FML
Today, in the middle of sex, my girlfriend yelled, "STUFF ME LIKE A TURKEY!" I couldn't finish. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She had her whole hand in me kind of deep. It was hitting everything inside me and triggered me to poop a little bit, on her arm and the bed. FML
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend for the first time, and she reached down to feel me up. When her hands got there, she stopped and said, "You're not even hard..." I was. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going at it doggy style, really fast, when she started laughing. I asked her what was so amusing and she giggled, "I can't feel anything in there." FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were about to have sex for the first time. We are both virgins. After we kissed and I took down my pants, she screamed and said "That THING is going to break me." We never did it. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she starts laughing and says, "Wow, this is just too funny." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
JuzReading 23
Reminds me of that FML where the girlfriend asked her boyfriend to get hard for her even though he was. Anyway, don't worry about it OP, this where your mouth and fingers come in handy.
Cads1 24
Ouch, that's gotta hurt.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (145)
Maguru 17
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Wouldn't happen to be called Justin would ya?
cluch3 22
I'm comfused. is there something I should know about this?.
tigerswordss 13
He meant Justin bieber
Maguru 17
No no, it's a simply a silly joke that was used a lot back when I was a tween about what a boy's name would be if he had a small penis. Literally "just in", nothing else to it. xD Was hoping to lighten the mood for the lad since being on the small side really isn't that much of a deal, but apparently the community isn't up for schadenfreude today. C:
Redgy22 26
thx for explaining. That's pretty funny! lol
FreakyDino98 13
no pretty sure it was a beiber joke
DaRito 25
I know it's not a Bieber joke, but it would be funnier if it was.
Cads1 24
Ouch, that's gotta hurt.
Gixie 25
Or in her case, not hurt.
dc2fresh 15
not to her
thawny_fml 21
Just **** her in the ass. She's sure to feel that.
alexanderavatar 24
better than "is it in yet?"
brandoneyez1 25
She clearly felt nothing lol.
Sangue0608 26
@109 No, not really.
taaywall 13
not her hahahah
MrGibbs25 20
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
looks like someone has a tic tac lol
pjsr 33
I hope it's just inexperience on her part. Women have very few nerve endings past the first couple inches - not sure what she was expecting.
FenHarel 9
Ummm, no? I can tell you from experience that's not true. At least not for everyone.
jezka374 15
Well you may not have nerve endings past a few inches, but I do. Sucks for you.
lovelockdown23 23
few nerve endings? psssshhh what kind of ****** do you have.
pjsr 33
From discovery health dot com, search ****** : "The internal walls of the ****** itself do not have a great supply of nerve endings, thus are not very sensitive to touch. The outer one-third of the ******, especially near the opening, contains nearly 90 percent of the vaginal nerve endings and therefore is much more sensitive to touch than the inner two-thirds of the vaginal barrel." I don't have one, but I sure know how to make one come. Its part science, part art, part practice. OP will be ok with time.
MRSwick2525 23
lolololol you went to discoveryhealth.com for information about the ******??? oh boy. Funny. Get a clue little boy.
cynthianicole95 9
Yeah idk what kind of ****** they're talking about ctfu
little_one 20
Umm yeah we can feel it... All of it.
FreakyDino98 13
#99 yah what they said:D
morgasshk 14
Damnit... I guess my tic tac comment will get creamed too. No idea why this is downvoted. I say good call!
DarkAngel12346 17
Just because we have less nerve endings doesn't mean we can't feel it
enginsteve 17
I do not believe in the female ******. It's in the Bible.
stevenN659 24
@129, woah. you're single right? I can see why
Onoconah 11
that must be why your mother's breathe is always so month fresh
CaptainBat 9
Damn dude. I'm sorry
haileyrows 26
Good thing you don't keep your personality in your dick. Hopefully it was just a thoughtless comment and she feels bad about it.
JuzReading 23
Reminds me of that FML where the girlfriend asked her boyfriend to get hard for her even though he was. Anyway, don't worry about it OP, this where your mouth and fingers come in handy.
seninaa 27
That must have been awkward...
Ashamed_Sister 60
Still better than the simple question "Is it in yet?"
PePziNL 20
Just respond to that with: "I don't know"
arrowgold 19
They say it's not the size but how you use it right?
Badkarma4u 17
The only people that say that are guys with small units.
Angelrose2004 17
False. I'm a woman and say that. I'd rather have a guy more experienced in different positions and knew how to use his fingers and tongue than to have a man with a large penis.
9a_1z 12
Yup, for many ladies stimulation by penetration only gets you so far.
vampire623 6
That depends I know a girl who had a ex with a big one but did not know how to use it but then again if your to small no amount of skill is going to help
scarlett3diaz 24
Hey, i like my men big, but there's been men that know how to use their small buddy
vampiregal16rulz 5
Certainly true. However big and knowing how to use it is quite amazing.
aylatan_ 9
Honestly, out of who I've been with, the guy with the smallest penis was the best at actual intervcourse. Just proves that size isn't anything.
Osafune 19
Maybe just try a different position. That can make a huge difference.
Myo_fml 20
Cowgirl would probably work out just because her weight will be pulling her down then and there's more pressure and all.
9a_1z 12
There's lots of different positions to try! He could see it as a benefit that there's less of a likelihood he'll end up painfully jabbing her in the cervix when trying things out. There's also lots of toys to try, it can be a great opportunity to have fun rather than just compensating for something.