Today, was my boyfriend's birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML
Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML
Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML
Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had been telling me for the past two weeks that he had something planned for the occasion. His plan? Me watching TV with his parents, who hate me, while he went to work. His gift? A brand new Xbox 360 for himself. FML
Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML
Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML
Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend presented me with his cock with a ribbon on it. Basically, HE wanted sex for MY birthday and had the nerve to accuse me of being ungrateful. For his birthday last month, I gave him multiple Xbox games. He couldn’t even be bothered to get me flowers. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
mclayton37 0
See... Your boyfriend has a problem. He likes to mix his pleasures. It just doesn't work. You have to put a stop to it, before one day he's playing video games, talking on the phone, taking a dump, and gettin a BJ from you all at the same time.. NO! It's like that episode of Seinfeld when George tries to enjoy some pastrami and watching TV while having sex.. you gotta stop it before it gets worse!
Envy_fml 0
Ouch.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (235)
thebigslim 13
You are a hell of a girlfriend to do something like that for him! I can only wonder why he died =P good work lol.
Chfanfiction 0
I'm a 15-year-old boy. So yeeeaaaahhh.
TheLetterZero 7
So, in short, it's typical of most 360 owners.
Travestie616 0
That.. is hilarious. Well, at least you've discovered you're straight (I think). Then again, you're a 15 year old boy who is never going to get a ******* because you think it's gross, which is twice as funny. Wtf??
TheLetterZero 7
It's sad that you think it's a bad thing to not get a bj. What is the world coming to...
haxromana 2
So asking your boyfriend what he wants to do on his birthday and then doing it when it turns out to be something sexual and maybe a little bit lame is "subservient?" Can you explain your reasoning or is "subservient" just the June 21 entry on your Word-A-Day calendar?
Chfanfiction 0
Why is that funny? It's like thinking it's funny that somebody allergic to peanuts won't ever eat peanuts. who cares, since it's something you obviously don't want in the first place?
Chfanfiction 0
By the way, thanks for questioning my sexuality for having a minor preference.
moose91894 0
.
Chfanfiction 0
Who gives ******** anyway? Yecch.
onigiriqueen 0
You must not have a very lucky boyfriend, if you have one at all. If you do, I feel sorry for him.
plexico 4
It was your fault for distracting him during the game!
gamerchick0711 0
Gives new meaning to "Tango Down" LMAO!! I love it..as a female gamer, I'm down for some good oral during the game! The only difference is I'm owning all the guys when I play and wouldn't have a reason to slam the controller down. Good for you for being a fun girlfriend! Tell your boy Happy Birthday for me! I think I'll go play some COD4 now that I think of it.
ArmyOfOne 0
You got Live? :P
iTzAcrazyLifE 0
Cool i got live too! Fallenshinobi23!! 12 yr old killer btw luv da comments here
tencalories 3
damn just damn
keluiserious 0
he's such a idiot.
Bryan_Z 0
Isn't dating a 2 year old illegal?
allstarplayer324 0
And guys wonder why girls won't do that...
uhohmistakeo 0
Really? What kind of dude asks for head while playing a game?
minette08 0
you must have not been doing a very good job if he was able to concentrate that much