Today, was my boyfriend's birthday. He wanted a blowjob while playing Call of Duty 4. In typical gamer fashion, he slammed his controller down when he died. Into my head. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job, he was twitching and moving around and saying "oh yeah" then he said "take that bitch". I looked up to see he was only excited about how he is domination in Call of Duty 4. FML
Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML
Today, I found out that whilst I was asleep last night, my boyfriend was playing on his XBox. I also found out that whenever he unlocked a new level, achievement or just generally beat someone's ass, he would celebrate by pulling out one of his pubes and putting it in my mouth. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML
Today, I was playing Xbox live with my boyfriend. I was bored so I decided to mess around. So I put down my remote and unbuttoned his pants. Two minutes in he said, "Hurry up, we're getting killed without you. Besides you're way better at video games." FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had been telling me for the past two weeks that he had something planned for the occasion. His plan? Me watching TV with his parents, who hate me, while he went to work. His gift? A brand new Xbox 360 for himself. FML
Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML
Today, I played Call Of Duty online against someone who turned out to be wanking. FML
Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML
Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend presented me with his cock with a ribbon on it. Basically, HE wanted sex for MY birthday and had the nerve to accuse me of being ungrateful. For his birthday last month, I gave him multiple Xbox games. He couldn’t even be bothered to get me flowers. FML
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Top comments
mclayton37 0
See... Your boyfriend has a problem. He likes to mix his pleasures. It just doesn't work. You have to put a stop to it, before one day he's playing video games, talking on the phone, taking a dump, and gettin a BJ from you all at the same time.. NO! It's like that episode of Seinfeld when George tries to enjoy some pastrami and watching TV while having sex.. you gotta stop it before it gets worse!
Envy_fml 0
Ouch.
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Comments (235)
kirby229 0
"Personally, serves you right." makes absolutely no sense. Learn some grammer. And how is it disgusting? Do you think sex is disgusting too? I understand that some people see it as degrading, even though I don't agree with them, but how is it disgusting? To the OP: FYL for trying to do something nice and getting a bump on the head for it. Then FYL again for all the idiots who tell you YDI because you were giving a bj.
imkendra 0
Okay, that was pretty dumb on your part. Birthday or not, if you're going downtown, dude needs to give you his full attention. Playing videogames during sex and sex acts is rude and it's ridiculous that you went along with it.
lmmmr 0
Please don't comment if you can't speak proper English.
silentlullaby 0
Personally, I question why you would give him a ******** while playing videogames. That was your first mistake.
chirs3 0
Sorry about the crack on the head, but agreeing to it was your first mistake. "Give me a ******* while I completely ignore you", and your answer is yes? YDI.
Joey_M 0
You are an awesome gf. Just hope he repays you equally on your bday.
Belgian 0
what sick person wants to share a bj with COD in the first place :s :s Either play the game, or enjoy the bj, but doing the two things together only shows that he cares more about the game then about you. If he'd respect you, he'd give you his full attention while you're doing that. That's what I think, anyway.
stringoffail 0
At least he didn't corpse-hump you.
CassandraBear93 0
well some people like there girlfriends to go down on them while they are driving
Travestie616 0
Haha, that's hilarious. My ex wanted the same thing while we were dating, only he was playing Halo online, and apparently he didn't have the ability to multitask that your boyfriend has. He ended up quitting the game after less than a minute =P Perhaps your boyfriend was so into the bj, his mind got a little fuzzy and that's why he did it? I dunno, but again, that's funny as hell.