Today, the vibrator I ordered online was delivered. I'd paid extra to make sure it would be here before the weekend, so I could sneak it into my room while everyone was gone. My dad decided to stay home all day and answer the door ahead of me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally received the vibrator I ordered online. Too bad they labeled what the item was on the outside of the box, and my dad was the one to pick up the packages. FML
Today, after assuming I'd been scammed, I finally found the vibrator I ordered over 2 months ago. It was in my mom's bedside cabinet. FML
Today, I got a new vibrator, raced all the way home, tore my pants off, took it out of the box, and then my grandmother walked in my front door. Apparently she's spending the night so she can make it to a doctor's appointment in the morning. FML
Today, I got home from my vacation. The last few days of my trip, I stayed at my father's house. I was having trouble sleeping last night so I decided to use a little "discreet" vibrator that I travel with. When I unpacked back home, I realized I'd forgotten the vibrator in my bed at my father's house. I'm mortified. FML
Today, my dad surprised me by moving my bed (involving disassembling and reassembling it) in my new room, because I couldn't find how I wanted to set it up. He also took care of putting back my vibrator between the mattress and the base, where it was hidden. FML
Today, I got home from my 6-week vacation. Apparently, my mum cleaned my room for me while I was gone because my vibrator was neatly tucked into my blanket, next to my pillow instead of being hidden under my bed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I ordered sex toys online and had them delivered to my dorm room. I put my parents' address for the billing information because I didn't want the bill sent to my dorm after I moved out. The toys were sent to my parents' house instead. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I realized that the vibrator we bought got sent to his parents house. He picked it up from them, brought it home, and we discovered that they had already opened the package. They even tried to hide the evidence by re-taping it. FML
Today, I received my package. I ordered a vibrator, I was so excited to use it, but when I was finally ready to use it, I found out that it broke during the delivery. FML
Today, I woke up and found $30 slipped under my door with a note that read, "Please buy yourself a quieter vibrator. - Mom and Dad." FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Cat_Daniels 6
OMG I would be like "I Guess mom isn't that impressed with u..."
djskidd 9
That sucks. Enjoy the vibrator though!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (154)
Fmlsea 28
U would of been better going to the store to buy it urself
every1luvsboners 11
Your sense of deductive reasoning is amazing. You're a gifted lady, I don't care what anyone says. (and they say a lot) Good day.
Pelreskovich 11
So what, the box had a big vibrator logo on it, no, most likely it was inside a shipping box do your dad answering the door is irrelevant. Ugh.. Just play with yourself why they sleep..
lilpowers 3
And i'll bet that was a fun discussion with daddykins.
asherm 15
He wanted to see what the buzz was all about ;P
linkinpark98 24
I see what you did there.....!
itsvanessa1 0
haha its safe tho.at least ur not gona go out and do it rite?
1happymummy 14
Dont they arrive in plain boxes? Unless he opened your mail he shouldnt have been able to tell what was inside
ohheyitslauren 0
Unless it's being delivered in a box with "VIBRATORS R US" slapped on the side, I really don't see the problem. Any place that sells things of that nature probably knows enough to have discrete packaging...
wittygirl 8
Where did you order it from? When I got my vibrator it was in a plain box. No one knew what it was so why are you bring a drama llama unless he decided too pen YOUR mail then it's a federal offense. I day report his uptight ass!
cetlawizard 15
op are you even old enough to order 18+ year old adult oriented items, and if so...why still living with parents? Maybe you should worry about getting your own place before worrying about your self pleasure issues? Just saying....own place=not being embarrassed by daddy answering the door for delivery of adult toys....if you're not an adult yet...you don't need those yet...YDI for being not smart enough to @ least get a P.O. Box
Discombobulated9 12
Some people are too poor to move out instantly. Some people need to work for a while and save up. Some people generally aren't ready to move out of their family home at the age of 18. Sorry, I guess we're not all as perfect as you are, you self-righteous bastard.
Voldy_fml 16
Why don't you go out and buy one? But maybe they don't sell them where you are. Where I live, they sell them in shops. But I would've loved to see his reaction! xD