Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML
Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML
Today, I was on the subway. I have fairly serious OCD, so I avoided holding the poles or handles. All the seats were taken, so I leaned against a wall. At the next stop, an obese, sweaty man got on and grabbed the two poles around me, effectively hugging me. My shirt was wet when he left. FML
Today, I gave up my seat on the subway for an elderly man. He thanked me by grabbing my ass. FML
Today, I was on a crowded subway going home. My trousers were a bit dusty so I tried to dust myself off. As I was slapping the side of my leg I missed and hit a woman behind me in the ass. She called me a pervert and walked off. Everyone stared at me. It takes 40 minutes to get home. FML
Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML
Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML
Today, I took a busy train into the city. I was lucky enough to get a seat. People were forced to stand in the aisle in front of me, and the person directly opposite me, whose butt was level with my head farted in my face. Twice. FML
Today, I was on the subway and saw this cute guy eyeing me. I crossed my legs, tossed back my hair, and raised my eyebrows slightly. As he came up to me, my heart started racing until he finally started flirting... with the girl next to me. FML
Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
bekahshae 0
After you got off, you should have said, "Now that'll be twenty dollars."
lucaso86 0
YAY for creepy boners
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (186)
ursonotknowin 6
awwww. :( sry, girl. that man was seriously a creeper. but at least u have a nice enough ass to randomly give some guy a boner ;)
suckituppunk 0
xD probably the most action that guy has ever had. ****** shove him really hard or tell him to turn around or there's gunna be some problems...
bossladybodega 0
that really sucks. but i definitely knew this happened in New York before i even read the location
Sophia93 0
because of the crowded train right
snzmky 0
I signed up for FML just to post on this comment because you people pissed me off so much. To all those assholes saying YDI for not taking a cab, screw you. Have you ever BEEN to Manhattan? Do you know how expensive that shit is?? Not to mention you're just as likely to get perved on by your creepy driver. A bus or subway: 2 dollars A cab: 2.50 minimum fee, stuck in traffic for ungodly amounts of time, have to tip the cabbie, and pay out the ass. That said, you deserve it for not riding your bike or walking. The subway is for loser people.
TotalPandamonium 2
Much like it may have been too expensive to pay a cab. It may have been too far to walk and the person might not have a bike.
menschmaschine5 0
Usually a 20 minute subway ride is more like an hour long walk, and a fairly long bike ride as well. What if she was on the train longer than 20 minutes? Going to another Borough maybe? That's not very doable on foot unless you're in no hurry at all.
piano993 0
thats gotta suck.
plexico 4
You should have inched forward then backward, then forward, then backward, then forward, then backward, then forward, that's it! Keep it going. You could have helped him take care of that erection. Where are people's sense of civic duty and care for one's fellow man?
DunHassleDuhHoff 0
I know; humanity has gone to the *****. Remember when you could get layed just by falling asleep on the bus? That was when decent people still existed
Kenpachi_fml 0
FYL is what he did in the subway ^_^
jessxoxo28 5
ugh, thats disgusting. im not a huge fan of the subway =S
turbosexophonic 0
YDI for grinding yer ass on his dick. even ray charles saw that coming :|
crin89 0
Ugh, that happened to me at a gig once. I managed to get right to the front but it was pretty crowded, and the guy behind me had a huge boner. The really worrying thing, though, was that he was not so much jumping (like everyone else) as thrusting... :/