Today, realizing how poor I am, I decided to steal gas. The only place I was brave enough to steal from was my parents' lawn mower. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was looking for a job. I was so desperate for gas money to drive around town that I had to steal $20 from my sister. She's only 10 years old. FML
Today, I was so ashamed of being broke that instead of asking my parents for money, I snuck into their house while they were at work to steal some of their food. FML
Today, I went to drive my mom's car for a change. It wouldn't start, so I open the hood. Someone had stolen the battery. I go to start my own car so I can drive to the police station to report the theft, and discover someone siphoned off my gas. FML
Today, I heard water splashing outside of my house; I investigated it, only to find my dad, whom I don't live with, syphoning gas out of my car. FML
Today, my neighbor's son siphoned the fuel out of my lawn mower and put it in his car. What he didn't realize is that the fuel mixture I use in my lawn mower would ruin his car engine. His dad says it's my fault and actually insists I should pay his pissant son's repair bill. FML
Today, I realized the only way I can pay my bills this month is if I steal from my 8 year old's birthday money. FML
Today, my dad agreed to let me borrow the car to go rock climbing with my friends. He'd just filled it up with gas, which is how I realized halfway back home that one of my "friends" had siphoned well over half the gas straight out of the tank. FML
Today, I had to drive down to my parents' house. On they way down, I needed to fill up on gas but unfortunately I'd forgotten my wallet at home with all of my cash and credit cards. I then had to call triple A and explain to them in all seriousness how I ran out of gas at the gas station. FML
Today, my financial situation is so dire that I tried to steal toilet paper from work. I got caught. FML
Today, I was standing in the gas station, pulling out my wallet to pay the $100 of gas I just filled my car with. I opened my wallet and found a note saying "borrowed money for food". FML
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Top comments
flockz 20
instead of stealing their gas, why don't you mow their lawn for some cash?
NOTquiteRAMBO 10
^ Horrible pun.
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Comments (151)
newlove_fml 0
At least you stole the gas from a lawn mower instead of a gas station. Theft raises prices, which just screws everybody over. Not to mention, I think your grass being a few inches too tall is better than the possibility of getting arrested.
Zeronos 0
Sell your car for gas money. Simple enough for a simpleton such as yourself.
murdersquirrel 15
Gift of the Maji /=/ advice
connor77_fml 0
Well that's retarded. If you sell ur car for gas money. Then you get some but what are you going to do with gas and no car?
bubo_fml 11
What kinda gas does your car use? Gangsta-line!
sleepRX 16
I'd hardly call it, "bravery"; I'd call it, "cowardly". A braver act would be to humble yourself and ask for a loan from your parents, instead of doing them an injustice by stealing from them.
hateevryone 15
wow, you're THAT poor?
jackassiddy 8
Wow. You're that THAT much of an ass? I think a lot of people have stood in front of the gas pump and debated on getting a full tank so that they could afford food for the week at one point in their lives.. its called college..
jackassiddy 8
What a dumbass.. that THAT? Really? *thumbs comment down* ..wait
rubberduckie94 13
actually not just college. LIFE in many situations. unfortunately sometimes you actually have to stand in front of the gas tank thinking. OK i can put this much in, still pay my insurance, but in order to buy food for the week for my family i will have to call into work and use a couple of sick days cause it will not be enough gas for the week. dang i wish there were buses in my area or it was possible to walk to work. Its just a shame ops parents would not evidently give him some money or have him do some chores for gas
rubberduckie94 13
thats very true. sometimes fml just do not have enough info. at any rate he should not have been stealing. many a time i have just sat my butt at home because there was no gas. i just wonder where he needed to go so badly he was willing to steal.
reaganomics 6
Not quite true # 18, time for a small engine lesson, there are two types of small engines used in push mowers 2 strokes and 4 strokes, 2 strokes usually require a 1/3 oil mix with the gasoline, while 4 strokes operate like a car engine, using a oil reservoir and fuel injection, if he put the 1/3 oil mixture in his engine it's going to smoke and could in all likely hood seize the motor depending on the car make....either way Op is an idiot
MissRoxiie 12
Walk or take the bus, stealing will just get you in trouble.
ty1992_farmlife 12
Lawn mowers use straight gas or diesel (if you gotta big lawn mower) . Most lawn mowers hold up to 5 maybe 6 gallons, if its full so he wouldn't get much... but staeling it from your parents, that dude needs to get a job
vivaladino 7
Reads 'decided to steal gas' - YDI
MurphyS94 4
Reads 'decided to steal' - YDI
Capt_Oblivious 10
That's how it starts, with the recreational crimes.