Today, realizing how poor I am, I decided to steal gas. The only place I was brave enough to steal from was my parents' lawn mower. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was looking for a job. I was so desperate for gas money to drive around town that I had to steal $20 from my sister. She's only 10 years old. FML
Today, I was so ashamed of being broke that instead of asking my parents for money, I snuck into their house while they were at work to steal some of their food. FML
Today, I went to drive my mom's car for a change. It wouldn't start, so I open the hood. Someone had stolen the battery. I go to start my own car so I can drive to the police station to report the theft, and discover someone siphoned off my gas. FML
Today, I heard water splashing outside of my house; I investigated it, only to find my dad, whom I don't live with, syphoning gas out of my car. FML
Today, my neighbor's son siphoned the fuel out of my lawn mower and put it in his car. What he didn't realize is that the fuel mixture I use in my lawn mower would ruin his car engine. His dad says it's my fault and actually insists I should pay his pissant son's repair bill. FML
Today, I realized the only way I can pay my bills this month is if I steal from my 8 year old's birthday money. FML
Today, my dad agreed to let me borrow the car to go rock climbing with my friends. He'd just filled it up with gas, which is how I realized halfway back home that one of my "friends" had siphoned well over half the gas straight out of the tank. FML
Today, I had to drive down to my parents' house. On they way down, I needed to fill up on gas but unfortunately I'd forgotten my wallet at home with all of my cash and credit cards. I then had to call triple A and explain to them in all seriousness how I ran out of gas at the gas station. FML
Today, my financial situation is so dire that I tried to steal toilet paper from work. I got caught. FML
Today, I was standing in the gas station, pulling out my wallet to pay the $100 of gas I just filled my car with. I opened my wallet and found a note saying "borrowed money for food". FML
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Top comments
flockz 20
instead of stealing their gas, why don't you mow their lawn for some cash?
NOTquiteRAMBO 10
^ Horrible pun.
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Comments (151)
TJSpeed91 4
ummm if the mower was a two stroke dont plan on running that fule through your car...
Fuzzysbutt 0
So if you can't even afford gas then cancel your Internet. And if you won't do that then you don't deserve gas.
blinkingstarlet 15
Actually, most Internet providers charge an astronomical cancellation fee. He might just be going through a rough month. you wouldn't cancel your Internet if you knew next month it would be better... Plus how do you know he's not posting from free wifi or from a friends house.
Fuzzysbutt 0
Touché...
mrjude 3
Hahaha. How is your car running on gas from a two-stroke?
Futacy 30
Great idea OP, cuz whenever i run outta gas in wyoming i always look around searching for lawn mowers
Piixii3 0
lol!
lulzworthy 3
Reality check: You're a pussy.
statikvision 0
oh you're cool!
MissMeanie 5
Wouldn't it just easier to ask mom for 3 dollars rather than steal 3 dollars in gas?
texasboy22 0
You know lawn motors usually take diesel gas not regular for a car. Hope you knew that
spencerbalog 0
Freaking bum.