Today, realizing how poor I am, I decided to steal gas. The only place I was brave enough to steal from was my parents' lawn mower. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was looking for a job. I was so desperate for gas money to drive around town that I had to steal $20 from my sister. She's only 10 years old. FML
Today, I was so ashamed of being broke that instead of asking my parents for money, I snuck into their house while they were at work to steal some of their food. FML
Today, I went to drive my mom's car for a change. It wouldn't start, so I open the hood. Someone had stolen the battery. I go to start my own car so I can drive to the police station to report the theft, and discover someone siphoned off my gas. FML
Today, I heard water splashing outside of my house; I investigated it, only to find my dad, whom I don't live with, syphoning gas out of my car. FML
Today, my neighbor's son siphoned the fuel out of my lawn mower and put it in his car. What he didn't realize is that the fuel mixture I use in my lawn mower would ruin his car engine. His dad says it's my fault and actually insists I should pay his pissant son's repair bill. FML
Today, I realized the only way I can pay my bills this month is if I steal from my 8 year old's birthday money. FML
Today, my dad agreed to let me borrow the car to go rock climbing with my friends. He'd just filled it up with gas, which is how I realized halfway back home that one of my "friends" had siphoned well over half the gas straight out of the tank. FML
Today, I had to drive down to my parents' house. On they way down, I needed to fill up on gas but unfortunately I'd forgotten my wallet at home with all of my cash and credit cards. I then had to call triple A and explain to them in all seriousness how I ran out of gas at the gas station. FML
Today, my financial situation is so dire that I tried to steal toilet paper from work. I got caught. FML
Today, I was standing in the gas station, pulling out my wallet to pay the $100 of gas I just filled my car with. I opened my wallet and found a note saying "borrowed money for food". FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
flockz 20
instead of stealing their gas, why don't you mow their lawn for some cash?
NOTquiteRAMBO 10
^ Horrible pun.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (151)
Phrozenpu_fml 0
hmm sounds like someone i know -_-
mel_500 0
LOL we've all been there
fmlurlife 0
Jus ride a bike or use public trans
totreaper 0
If you are poor, make a porno
LaVitaEstetica 0
Lawn mower gas is mixed with oil. I don't think that's good for your car.
Daydreemdie 0
You now your gangster when...
KK3137 31
Why steal from your parents?? I'm aware that I don't know your whole situation, but surely you should be able to ask for some financial support, no?
carry_fml 4
Too funny
hoshi87 11
Do you not know its different gas?
j_difino 1
i used to do that when i was in high school...and you dont mix gas in a lawn mower...only in two stroke small engines like chain saws and weed eaters.